Blackest Role

Coldest

filthiest

Unnoticed

Blackest

lying on the coldest, filthiest coal.

acting the unnoticed, blackest role. 

Author's Note

This is a style of poetry called 'Tyburn'

Reviews

[Willard Wells]

Not my style, but I will defend your rights to use this form any time. Nice work. Thanks for sharing. I agree with your comment below about learning from new styles. While I seldom do that and do tend to write with the idea of a piece standing alone, it is good to step out of the comfort zone sometimes. For some of us it is harder than others due to the functions of our minds attempting to hold us back.

[guy drori]

Thank you for your comment. I agree with you. Must I say, this is not my regular writing style, yet as you stated above, I do believe that every writer, and in fact every person need sometimes leave his comfort zone and experiment with new things. It enhances your professionalism and it is definitely a challenge, and challenges are always a positive thing for they add to our growth as individuals.

[I Am Svetlana]

Some people have ugly souls, but it shouldn't make us think differently about how we live. Some people are just born bad, but we must do our best to be our best. Life is a beautiful thing, don't spend it making decisions that could ruin it.

[guy drori]

I cannot agree with what you said more than I already do. You have a great point there.
Thank you for you comment :)

[Devons]

I think this poem is led somewhat by its pre-designed format (having discovered what that was from a review comment below). I don't think it's necessary to know it is a 'Tyburn' poem beforehand as I think poetry should be able to stand alone, without further explanation (as with all art, the same, I feel). That's just a personal point of view, however. I don't think it detracts from the quality of the words and the execution of the piece either, though. Notwithstanding, I have learnt from this a form of formulaic poetry I had hitherto been ignorant of. And I like learning new things.
I like the punchy way this poem speaks to the reader in what it's saying and the intelligence it subtly emanates. And there is a sense of irony in it too which is affecting.

NB I may be wrong, but the definition of a Tyburn that I found indicated the first four lines should all rhyme. Is that not right..?

[guy drori]

Hello Devons, thank you for your review.
Addressing what you mentioned, labelling your poem as a certain form is not always necessary, you are right, yet I do believe it is often important for the same reason you mentioned above: It can teach another writer a new form. Adding to that, I believe that experimenting with new writing styles is very important, as it can enhance your professionalism.
And yes, you are right, the whole definition of a Tyburn is that the four first lines that must consist of two syllables need rhyme, yet I have strayed somewhat from the rule for I found it too restricting. perhaps I will consider revision to make it into a full Tyburn poem :)
Thank you :)

[Devons]

I agree with you about discovering new form: it is also true, however, that form can be discovered by oneself. Like I said, it's personal position I'm taking here - I have learnt of most formulaic templates through reading examples of them on here, but I wouldn't choose to use one myself. Like you said yourself it is restricting and I think that often gets in the way of expression as well as potentially enhancing it.

[guy drori]

Well, everyone is entitled to their own opinion :) Though I can definitely tell you from experience that sometimes "forcing" yourself to fit a poem in a certain form really improves the way you handle words...though true it is certainly restricting.
As so if by any chance you would wish to read about new forms (Of course you do not need to write them) Here is a site that will help you.
Enjoy !
http://www.poetryfoundation.org/learning/glossary-terms?category=forms-and-types

[Devons]

Interesting. Salute!

[Some Kind of Poet]

Great imagery in this short write! I enjoyed it, thoroughly. Thank you for sharing!

[guy drori]

Glad you liked it :)

[MsJewel]

Your creativity shines in this short little gem. Well done!

Julie

[guy drori]

Thank you Julie :)

[Kshitij Srivastava]

Fantastic short write...Liked the use of words in the concluding line :)

[guy drori]

Thank you !
Some words had to be the way they were... It's a Tyburn poem.
Glad you liked it :)

[Kshitij Srivastava]

oops sorry for the uneducated review
Googled it....I like it way more now...Awesome man 👏