Love Note Body Bags

Accidental list poem.

I was reading Derrick Brown’s poem,

The Rise and Fall of Julius Walker,

it was a good one.

I felt like writing it on all the palm trees in California

and hope that someone would take the time to read it

before the trunks burn away

from the passion of it all.

It made me think about how

some hugs are far more enjoyable

if something gets broken in the process.

I wanted to staple it to my door

so I could feel what it’s like to slam that poem,

and not care about how lame that pun was.

I thought about how

sometimes I’ll play Jack Johnson

to make me feel better

and how hearing him

reminds me how lonely I can get.

Association.

Counter productive.

It made me want to whisper a syringe

into someone’s neck

while crossing my fingers

behind my back.

If talking about politics turns you on

I’m not the right guy for you.

If you prefer body bags

filled with love notes,

we just might have something.

I like watching water boil.

I like the taste of nacho chips

dipped in apple sauce

I like the taste of tongue

from a girl who smokes

and cusses a lot.

Especially, while it’s tied

like a Celtic cross.

I wish my hands didn’t shake

familial tremors.

It makes me nervous about

things that make me nervous,

but I imagine I’m pretty good at

typing through an earthquake.

I could hit on someone

and they’ll laugh

like I made a joke,

but I really do wanna know if you come here often.

I sometimes dream about

swan diving out of a motorcycle accident,

and receiving a perfect score

before disappearing like an eraser.

If misery turns you on

you won’t enjoy my company

but I’ll enjoy yours.

The sweltering heat of loneliness and lust

reminds me of the first time I made love

and how we forgot to remove our socks.

The first time I heard the phrase,

‘catch a break,’

I thought it was something painful.

Same thing for ‘flattered.’

I thought about

how great it would be to meet someone

that I could read Derrick’s piece to,

and who’ll appreciate me

for the un-originality

of reading her someone else’s poem.

Author's Note

The Rise and Fall of Julius Walker by Derrick Brown is in a phenomenal book of poetry called Born In The Year Of The Butterfly Knife.

Pick up the book if you're curious. Derrick Brown is just so worth it:
http://writebloody.com/shop/products/born-in-the-year-of-the-butterfly-knife/

Reviews

[Adora.xo]

I don't know where to begin.

I honestly don't.

"If talking about politics turns you on
I’m not the right guy for you.

If you prefer body bags
filled with love notes,
we just might have something."

You are a genius. I heard this in my head while I read it, and it was flawless. It was brilliant. I've not read the book but I did purchase some time ago. Alas, duties call and I haven't found the time to read it. But after this, I think I will. I loved every line of this piece, you don't understand. "But I imagine I'm pretty good at typing through an earthquake."

That is so real. Each line fit so well, simply because it felt like it was coming straight from the mind. A string of thoughts. And lord can I relate to these. I have a similar feeling after reading a book that I thoroughly enjoyed. This itching, silently desperate, need to make it know, how wonderful it was to read the words written by this genius. That goose-bumps-up-my-sleeves feeling, when you close flip the last page and wish that, that brief feeling of euphoria that fitters over your skin could be known by more people. Simply, so that you are not the only one to feel it.

Brilliant job, this is by far my favorite piece.

~Adora

[Elizabeth]

So, of course I had to go read the other piece and come back and reread your s in context. And the last stanza makes perfect sense, now. Why would you want to meet someone to read that to? It would mean you had lost her... but then, that fits right in with the theme, here. I was smiling and cringing all the way through. Too many great images to chose from...this is tragic and hilarious and brilliant all at once.

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

Wow dude. Your tension built all the way through. I expected some kind of peak but you didnt hit it until the last line. It got better and better as I read. Its amazing how long this poem is, but yet a person could take any stanza and still have the general idea of it all. It has an overwhelming feeling of being such a complete idea. You left no stone unturned. This is excellent work. I thought your imagery was great, but the personal feeling of your thoughts was most impressive. If this is a fictional character...you have created life.

[deadly healer]

i laughed through almost all of the poem although im not quite sure why. it is very addicting to read and i congradulate u for writing such a piece. i loved this poem. very unique i must say.

[JENY]

A thoughtful write…
Authentic feelings…
Enjoyed it very much….

[Shelly Braen]

This is sinisterly provocative. Like a devil, bound with flowers in his hair. Like a lullaby with dangerous sex appeal. Like kissing hot candle wax. I adore this. It is so raw and the imagery is delectable. Bravo, bravo. ^_^

[Emily B]

oh, wow, I guess I'll take you up on the invitation to go read the other piece

[RonnieBreight]

Wow, I really like this. Like, it just seems so free. I feel like I'm looking into someone's mind, and that is an awesome feeling my friend. Thank you so very much for sharing. :).

[emmajoy]

There's more of a person in this than in a painting .. it's an expose of thoughts, whether literary or fact or maybe both!

Some great lines: ' I sometimes dream about ~ swan diving out of a motorcycle accident, ~ and receiving a perfect score ~ before disappearing like an eraser.'

Not sure if this is a warning or kind advice, whichever, is flows into a great read ..

[hmm]

This is a wonderful write here. I really enjoyed this.