Collective Epiphanies

Inspired by a dream...

Cobblestones are burning beneath the street lights.
They say
we’re walking with too much friction.
We need to be cool.
The sky is choking clouds
and making faces at me.
Stop pretending to be and
just be.
We’ve already seen who you can be,
now, just be you.

As if trying to make more space for something
the traffic rearranges itself.
The streets have no idea what merging is
and the singing birds have not yet learned
that fire sirens aren't

their brethren's calls returned.

I told you there was something here
and laughing you twirled sunlight around your finger.
You painted the air with presence,
I still have trouble breathing.
If you put your ear against my chest
you can hear the ocean in my lungs
rising to the pull of your moonlight skin.
Your
gravity.

You laugh at me
when I tell you nice things.
You can’t take me seriously.
That’s why I do.

I get so lost sometimes
I almost know where I am again.
You catch me in your Rubix-kaleidoscopic eyes
and whisper under your breath,
This is just the beginning
Even if it’s the end of something else.

I wanted you to know,
it wasn’t always this beautiful.

You helped me notice.

Flocks of crayon colored static drips from stereo speakers
from beings caught between frequencies
of broadcasted solitude in-between radio stations.
A daydream is stuck in your head
as you hum a song
no one has ever heard.
Where did you learn to bend notes so beautifully?
You laugh at me again,
not taking me seriously.
Honestly.
We must have traveled here in a pensive hourglass.
The sand spinning like a halcyon tornado in our sleep,
saying,
Take your time.
You deserve it.

I forget things easily
so be patient with me, please,
because in this place, you hold 
all collective epiphanies.

I know I’m going to wake soon.

I close my eyes and wait for eternal to pass.
I can smell rain.
As each moment echoes off our breath like reverb
all six billion hearts beat at once and everything stops.
I feel your hand close around mine,
I hear you breathe to say something,
I open my eyes,
and everything
stops.

Author's Note

... I'm gonna miss her.
Here's daydream music.

Reviews

[Sabbath_Nikole]

What the hell dude. You just blew me outa the water with this stuff. spins sunligh around her finger? Rubix-kaleidoscopic eyes? You can hear the ocean in my lungs
Rising to the pull of your moonlight skin? Only a few of my favorite lines. Dude, i think i just fell in love with youuuuuu! Seriously, printing this s**t out and putting it on my wall for inspiration. A-f*****g-mazing. For real. Beautiful.

[Doreen]

This reads as a dream - random thoughts that come together somehow, like bubbles that cling together. Very original.

[Alicante lullaby]

beautiful.one of loveliest writes i have ever read here..ohhh,i dont even know what to praise most.

[WriterSki7]

And thanks to your poem, so will we all.
Ah, the sweet melody of love. Here's to the life that is but a passing dream. This was an excellently written poem. Albiet it had no rhyme, it flowed very nicely. Lol now only if the college computer would load the daydream melodies. I swear, the Dean hates music.

[Ruth]

I love the flow to this, awesome use of words:) A really powerful poem, love:) Excellent write that has moved me! xx

[SamBug]

This was very good.

[.]

very well kept intact through it's length.. trance like almost...nice

"I hear you breath to say something"

breath or breathe

[Ama May Cooper]

Brilliant filled with a beautiful feeling of emotions. Read well of the page, the repetition of birds early on is somewhat irritating but made up for with the fluent and beutiful description use throughtout. A great write

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

I like the way this poem is random in nature, but all of the ideas all band together and move together in unison. This is a nice collection of thoughts. Its cool how each one of these moments can be magnified and be the apex of a single story.The images and settings are superb. It is a poem that is very easy to get lost in. It feels good to be able to just let go with writing like this. I enjoyed this poem alot. It was great. I found it interesting how you had such a romantic touch with an undertone of dissonance.

This poem is creative and it has good energy in the lines. It would definitely keep an audience's attention.

Suggesting how we "would have wrote" this poem is asinine and totally irrelevant. It's just bogus because we didn't have the creative inspiration to write this poem or we would have. This is your work and to change it based on a critic's inconsiderate ramblings compromises your integrity.

[Alessander]

This def has a dreamlike quality to it, and i think it's because the transitions are so abrupt and seemingly sporadic, like dream sequences. You give a lot of good lines, too many to list, however, you also have a lot of lines which I think clutter or slow down the poem. It would take forever explaining why I would omit or rearange certain lines, but if this were MY poem, this is how I would edit it.



Cobblestones are burning beneath street lights
They say
We’re walking with too much friction
We need to be cool
The sky is choking clouds

As if trying to make more space for something
The traffic rearranges itself
The streets have no idea what merging is
And the birds have no idea
That fire sirens aren’t other
Really boisterous birds

I told you there was something here
And laughing you twirled sunlight around your finger
Painting the air with presence
I still have trouble breathing
If you put your ear against my chest
You can hear the ocean in my lungs
Rising to the pull of your moonlight skin
Your
Gravity

You laugh at me
When I tell you nice things
You can’t take me seriously

I get so lost sometimes
I almost know where I am again
You catch me in your Rubix-kaleidoscopic eyes
whispering under your breath
This is just the beginning
Even as other things end

I wanted you to know
It wasn’t always this beautiful

You helped me notice

Flocks of crayon colored static drips from stereo speakers
From beings caught between frequencies
Of broadcasted solitude in-between radio stations
A daydream is stuck in your head
As you hum a song
No one has ever heard
Where did you learn to bend notes so beautifully?
You laugh at me again
Honestly
We must have traveled here in a pensive hourglass
The sand spinning like a halcyon tornado in our sleep
Saying
Take your time
You deserve it

I forget things easily
So Be patient with me, please
Because in this place, you hold
All collective epiphanies

I know I’m going to wake soon

I close my eyes and wait for eternity to pass
I can smell rain
As each moment echoes off our breath like reverb
All six billion hearts beat at once and everything stops
I feel your hand close around mine
I hear you breath to say something
I open my eyes
And realities

Stop.

Don't know. But I kinda want it to end with that imperative, STOP. But that's just me. These are merely suggestions, something to take in mind. Obviously you have lines in there for reasons, known or unknown, but that's just my two cents lol VERY GOOD WORK.

[Lilly]

This is breathtaking. The imagery is lovely, it is written so well and the feeling of the poem is great. Rather captivating. Beautiful work.