Where the sidewalk ends

A Poem by Anøn

I grew up
With cracks in the side walk, holes in the wall
Daddy was a heavy drinker, mother not at all
Until the day he died, i can still see
One police mans art project and the blood on the street
I asked him, can i use that chalk
Ive got a couple butterflies ive been meaning to draw
He sat silent like stone, with a shadow cast black
And he raised up his baton and with gravity smacked
My face withered from the hit
And my glasses cracked
But since that day, and an operation later
I now have a scar that covers the left side of my face
That was, only when i was eight
I would wake up everyday
With new anguish and more pain
Than the day before, i started to hate
Myself
But that was elementary and children are mean
By middle school my arms had been covered in seams
And only mamas love could repair what they had been
But she never could accept this new me
So she, like i, started ripping at her skin
But she couldnt take this hate that was coming from within
By the time that i, had turned fifteen
My mother swallowed bleach till her insides felt clean
The scripture, even though a good prescription
Could not, alleviate my illness
No cast put around it
And no matter if i drowned it
It was broken, no book it could be found in
I found a poem of why the cage bird sings
I connected it to me and together found empathy
I found that through words and poetry
That i could find sympathy i could do anything
I could change the world with my words
And then highschool hit
And everybody found words
That cut me open like a knife
That pierced my heart like bullets
I was so wounded, my emotions utter bullshit
I stayed up every night just talking to the moon
About my place in this world, everything i would do
I never saw her, but i could feel my mother
Maybe from the otherside tryna stop me from going under
Started living in the present, every breathe was a present
Formulating my escape from the pressures of a peasant
Undermined and denied just under the upper hand
Started unraveling the universal plan
And soon too soon started munching on shrooms
And i lost the better part of myself
Instead of getting high
I just balanced out the lows
Started getting trapped underneath the undertow
Until the day i
Learned words dont die
And embarked to become more than a human being
Because these angels
These angels are calling
And i, am all washed up
Living my life on the cusp
Sipping this life from a cup
I feel like these angels are falling
And were all snow
Just falling just sleeping
So different in who we are
Cause when you feel out of place
And your bodys defaced
We all are all just snow