Puppets Shadow

I live in the long shadows of the puppet

Listening to it's illusional word buffet

Impure candy coated sickly sweet

Can I endure these words of deceit

We are controlled 

By not government men

Those in the shadows 

Claim they are friends

Choices are made 

On our behalf

Spray dust in the skies 

Some more nerve gas

Take away that for which we have toiled
No dependence on self truly we're spoiled

The puppets strings slowly tighten their hold

They soon come for us our deaths be untold

Author's Note

revised

Reviews

[ali]

There are some interesting and unique metaphors in here- the candy, the buffet, the nerve gas. All are very effective in giving off the vibe of something seeming sugary-sweet on the outside, but then being volatile and deadly. My suggestions would be to relook the last stanza. It doesn't quite fit into what you are saying, I think. This poem does not need to be concluded with a moral, and I think that you can come up with something much like the first three stanzas. Also, read this poem aloud because there are some minor rhythm issues that can be easily fixed.
This is a good write! and thanks for the reviews btw

[Neva Flores Smith - Cha..]

A dark poem revealing a truth many cannot see.....excellent

[Angela]

Interesting. This poem is subtle and I almost missed it's significance, until I reread it. It is brilliant. It is the men behind the shadows, corrupt men that are truly governing and guiding our country. We have put ALL our trust in them. Ahhh, stupidity. We will reap the harvest for sure.

[Alvin L. Kathembe]

all true...there is a 'hidden hand' that determines the fate of the nations.
"We are controlled
By not government men"
great work, voicing the truth others are afraid to.

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

I have always felt we are just puppets. I like your use of metaphors also.
You got so much said within this poem. I am not good with short poems.. I admire those who can say so much using few words.
This is a wonderful write.

Chloe

[Dezaraye]

I use the analogy of being a puppet quite often in my life. I fear that the government is becoming more and more of a puppeteer than we even really realize. I like the imagery you've used. You've chosen simple words that keep it easily readable, yet so profoundly full of meaning. Nice work.

[KATHY SUE SILLS]

Great write! Love the meaning of the whole poem!

[Gone]

What can I add to Ali's review? My agreement and that I like the message. Political and ecological.