Writerscafe shouldn't be a gatekeeping opportunity

I have been on writerscafe for over a decade at this point. In that time, I have encountered and interacted with some truly wonderful people and writings. This community truly is unique and I would love for it to remain that way to all comers. Any way I can contribute to that, I will.

I do not feel like I should have to justify every action I take, but in this case I will make an exception so that maybe a change can occur.

As anyone who has reviewed me may have noticed, I do not respond to reviews. 

I have not for many years. I used to, back when I first joined, but then I stopped. I stopped for many reasons. I did not want to just say thanks. That felt insincere after a while and could get annoying if you ever happen to get a bunch of reviews at once. It also reduced the chance of me feeling the need to respond when someone left a review I didn't appreciate as much. 

If there has been any confusion about my attitude towards reviews, let me clear it up. I appreciate anyone who takes the time out of their day to appreciate my work and say something. (I appreciate you even if you don't say something and I never know because that's what I think every writer hopes for - to touch someone's mind or heart). I sincerely hope that anyone who reads my stuff and reviews does so because they like it. Not because they feel obligated to.

That's how I treat reviewing. I review anything I like and am drawn to. I review anytime I have something to say and I try to make it a meaningful review. I'm not perfect, and sometimes that probably is not communicated, but it is my intent. 

I have left well over a thousand reviews on this site. I have seldom gotten a review back. I do not expect one. I have rarely gotten a thanks. I do not expect one. I reviewed because I wanted to. I hope that whatever I had to say helped that person and I move on. 

No one is entitled to a review. 

No one is entitled to a thank you.

Sure they may be nice, but the fastest way to ruin anyone's good intentions is to demand it as a right.

And I completely understand if that means some people chose not to review me. Or read me. Or ever interact with me again. That's their choice. All I ask is that if you don't like me or how I operate, leave me alone. I'm not trying to bother you; don't bother me.

Author's Note

I feel like this should have a quick post script added. For those who’ve already reviewed this is 3/15/24. I welcome any and all discussion on the topic. Even if anyone disagrees and thinks I’m wrong. There are some things I did not say. This was in response to a specific interaction where I received continued (I would call it harassment) from someone who felt they could pressure me into doing things the way they decided I should. Secondly a large reason why I no longer respond is I simply have no time. I work a full time job. Just last year that meant 60+ hr work weeks. I do not have the time to be on here like I did when I was in high school.
As mentioned in the post, I do not respond to reviews and would find it hypocritical to start now (not to mention all the previous reasons still apply) but if anyone would like to personally discuss anything I’ve said with me, a message is always welcome. Assuming it’s not hostile of course.

Reviews

[Lorry]

Well at least now they can't say they don't know and yes, isn't it surprising how many people know all these completely unwritten rules about how this place works, despite everyone else thinking they know better too!
I remember one person tell me that they only review people who review them and didn't even see the obvious flaw in saying we should all do that! It took me about three seconds to figure out that I'd we all did that, we'd be forever waiting for our first review and I've even seen her giving that same piece of advice recently to a new writer!
Maybe that's how it works here, with everyone thinking their thoughts are right and never accepting change.
I doubt it though and doubt I know any better either.
I mean, personally I'd have a button that gave anyone who started a review with "well I just think....that gave them a shock, but that would only lead to mayhem when someone would hack it and turn it up from mild shock to electrocution.
Maybe it is best to let people be without resorting to making people pee themselves and just always look on the bright side of life (tee time tee diddle um 🎶)

[Marie]

You have given your reader something to think about for future reference, Green. Thank you for your open honesty. Blessings your way...

[Fia Naturie]

This is well said. Appreciate the honesty

[John the Baptist]

I usually reply, because someone took the time to read my work. Except for trolls. I delete them as soon as I see their names. I just hit that little button and they're history.

[M.E.Lyle]

This certainly was an eye opening read. You gave me much to think about.
Thanks for your insight into the world of...of, heck, I just don't know what.
I do appreciate your honesty and courage.
I hope your busy day goes well.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

There is such power in the written word. Words written down thousands of years ago continue influencing life on our planet today. From The Epic of Gilgamesh onward, poets strived to reveal themselves and share that power with each another. The great writers, poets, philosophers, psalmists and historians have created such wonderful reading for us all and we are all indebted to their influence. As for the "tit for tat" philosophy it's not a philosophy at all. It's called a "trade", a "swap", a "deal" or a "bargain". I'll gladly swap ideas and ideals or talk about whatever anyone wants. But I'm not demanding of anyone except myself and that, only to my betterment at my craft. Reviews left are welcome. I try to reply to most but I'm sure I don't get to all of them. I try to return reviews when I can. I don't mind anyone pointing out a typo in my work, actually I'd like to encourage that, but beyond that, I just go on doing what I'm doing, feeling more blessed than stressed because really, what else can a writer do but write? Maybe poets will be championed and rediscovered at some later point of cultural enlightenment. I mean, maybe...T.S. Eliot almost single- handedly brought John Donne out of obscurity. Who knows? But I think your words here are right on target and let the critics devour themselves. Jack London suffered a lot of rejection and criticism from publishers of his day. Even the Beatles were turned down for record contracts. Do what you do and keep sharing the light in the write. F.

[apennylate]

My daily attempts at long-winded side scrolling word adventures have left me nary the breath left to catch...
I am going to give this the good ol' college effort, as it is a subject I am most passionate about.

""I have been on writerscafe for over a decade at this point. In that time, I have encountered and interacted with some truly wonderful people and writings. This community truly is unique and I would love for it to remain that way to all comers. Any way I can contribute to that, I will.
I do not feel like I should have to justify every action I take, but in this case I will make an exception so that maybe a change can occur.""

*Agreed, and I like how we clearly stated our intent at the start, humbly. Change can only happen when someone actually friggin' tries, so I am all aboard thus far.*

""As anyone who has reviewed me may have noticed, I do not respond to reviews.
I have not for many years. I used to, back when I first joined, but then I stopped. I stopped for many reasons. I did not want to just say thanks. That felt insincere after a while and could get annoying if you ever happen to get a bunch of reviews at once. It also reduced the chance of me feeling the need to respond when someone left a review I didn't appreciate as much. ""

*As someone who once sought out external validation for his writing, and having found that validation, realizing it was about as helpful as a drawer full of holey socks... It IS insincere, to fathom emotional connection to each and every person who throws a string of it at you.*

""If there has been any confusion about my attitude towards reviews, let me clear it up. I appreciate anyone who takes the time out of their day to appreciate my work and say something. (I appreciate you even if you don't say something and I never know because that's what I think every writer hopes for - to touch someone's mind or heart). I sincerely hope that anyone who reads my stuff and reviews does so because they like it. Not because they feel obligated to.
That's how I treat reviewing. I review anything I like and am drawn to. I review anytime I have something to say and I try to make it a meaningful review. I'm not perfect, and sometimes that probably is not communicated, but it is my intent. ""

*you do not want tit for tat. quid pro quo is nice to give our ego a bump. but when it comes time to give back, are we doing it for justifiable reasons or for a pat on the back?*

""I have left well over a thousand reviews on this site. I have seldom gotten a review back. I do not expect one. I have rarely gotten a thanks. I do not expect one. I reviewed because I wanted to. I hope that whatever I had to say helped that person and I move on.
No one is entitled to a review.
No one is entitled to a thank you.
Sure they may be nice, but the fastest way to ruin anyone's good intentions is to demand it as a right.
And I completely understand if that means some people chose not to review me. Or read me. Or ever interact with me again. That's their choice. All I ask is that if you don't like me or how I operate, leave me alone. I'm not trying to bother you; don't bother me.""

*I have accrued over a thousand reviews on this site alone, and let me tell you... it hurt more than it helps. period. Have left over quadruple the amount of reviews for others, than I have received for myself mind you, so did I do it seeking comfort in the arms of the many?
That can only leave you bereft of the ability to conjure self solace.*

Which... in the end, is all we have...
Ourselves.

[Soren]

I completely respect your decision to do as you do. I am the opposite and have made it a habit to respond to anyone the reviews my pieces, not because I feel obligated to but simply to express my appreciation for their taking time to read my pieces. I like you write for my own self but I do appreciate hearing how they come across to others. No judgement here just an expression of gratitude to you for taking time to read my work and hope that you will respect my difference as I do yours

[Ken Simm.]

I am leaving a review on this because I would like to be associated with the view it espouses. I do leave reviews but only for writes and pieces I can say something good, encouraging, or profound about. If I don't like something I say nothing.
Encouragement I think is key here especially for the young or the new. Do more a review might say. But I hate seeing reviews that tell me how to do my craft. And what I could do better. That is unfortunately the way of the world in many cases. People always think they are better than others. When in actuality they are only showing that they are adherents to the Dunning Kruger effect.
I also review work that interests me and not just from friends. I don't enjoy some and so I don't review even if the person is a friend.I also don't become friends unless the person can show that they have read my work.