inside the dead of a car

This isn't true, but it feels like it is.

When you looked at me

Oh how it felt

Like the sword to the chest

My throat swollen and bleeding

I could no longer speak easy

But you said something

And you said it that night

About how I had no heart

And you were giving me everything you could

Oh the car it screeched and the tires burned

You and your anger, the way it had turned

You left me with nothing and I hate you for it

This world just feels like its full of your s**t

So what did I do, darling

Oh christ, what did I say

Was it the way I felt that night

Was your radio not enough

And can I fix this hole in my chest

Can I replace it with some drink

Will you take me back

If I tell you who I am

Oh the car it screeched and the tires burned

You and your anger, the way it had turned

You left me with nothing and I hate you for it

This world just feels like its full of your s**t

So don’t look outside tonight

Its our anniversary and I can’t see you

Tomorrow, just about two years ago

The day you died

The day you rested finally

Once more upon my chest

So take me home, god

Put something in my hand

I haven’t done anything

So why prove I’m a man

Oh my car it screeched and my throat it burned

Me and my sadness, the way it had yearned

I’ll leave them with nothing, but they’ll love me

Because I’m dying tonight and to them I’m daddy

Author's Note

If it sucks, tell me.

Reviews

[Call It A Day]

Dude, what a visceral exploration of a moment of pure sadness and insanity. When I first I read it, I was going to suggest finding more of a connection throughout, but then I realized that rarely do I ever find true connections in my writing, because, when caught in chaos, rarely do people find a moment of calm or clarity. A lot happens in this poem, which doesn't always work in my mind, but certainly does here. I'm excited to read more of your stuff, man!

[Coyote Poetry]

It isn't a bad poem. You packed a lot of emotion in this poem. Many kinds of poetry. This poem need to be read with a restful mind. A lot of hidden story and emotion in the words.
"And can I fix this hole in my chest
Can I replace it with some drink
Will you take me back
If I tell you who I am "
You asked the questions many will ask. I learn the hard way. "Better to say nothing if all you have to say is something negative. Word cab take down bridges that can't be repaired." A excellent poem.
Coyote