Romancing Her and the Night

The first serious poem that I wrote

I see nothing but your glowing face,

Across our decorated dinner table,

Under a moonless starlit sky,

In the backyard of our ancient house.

 

In that pitch darkness,

Comes a star falling,

As if to see you, celestial,

Dining with a mortal.

 

The rain comes down

To give us a fleeting visit,

Bringing with it the smell

Of wet mud and wet hair.

 

The wind whispers the most

Private of secrets from your heart

Secrets I already know

And secrets you’d want me to.

 

As you tuck your hair behind your ears,

Your eyes call out to me silently

While the farm horse surrenders to sleep,

I blow the last candle out.

Author's Note

Tell me what you liked and what you did not like about this poem

Reviews

[LoveStar]

You have great imaging capability, every scene was nicely imaged. However, I think that the described scences are a little bit disconnected, maybe you could connect them better?

[Ravyne Hawke]

I love the gothic feel this poem has and an otherworldliness. Romantic daring, to romance an immortal.. I enjoyed this well-written piece.