I, Dishwater

As the day is long

So goes the plumbing

Blub, blub…burble gurgle and thus more

Thus said again

As I swirl down the drain

And cause myself to disappear

And elsewhere I’m sure to then by the very nature of things, reappear

Running sheer

In gravity I steer

As I run out of things to rhyme about

And have long since gone beyond the very beginnings of the spout

In time immemorial

I have no marker to stand at my black residue end

And my list swirling spin

Thus sayeth the sink water lost

Reviews

[Lady B]

Well done I enjoyed the poem very much

[Butch Decatoria]

Great poem, we all can relate, since all is connected we are one.... Good and bad in all things...

[Mehak Mushtaq]

I like the idea of writing about noises. Everybody hears noises, no matter what profession. Your poem flows almost like a rhyme. I like it.

[gombeggar]

Lao Tzu said, “Water is fluid, soft and yielding. But water will wear away rock, which is rigid and unyielding.”

[lMarling]

This and, "I, Dishwasher" are really unique content wise. The concepts are great, this poem could be strengthened with more imagery.

Enjoyed reading it.

[gombeggar]

thanks much...very glad u enjoyed this and 'I, dishwasher'

[Shmoke-Sifted Heftlande..]

I love this! it's actually quite succinct in it's vibrational tone
it's aural edges have a lot of power
I like it when a poem rhymes and you barely notice
it lends form, without doing so overbearingly

[gombeggar]

much obliged

[Shmoke-Sifted Heftlander]

well, mastering dishes isn't as easy as one would think, and expressing it is even more advanced in my humble opinion, so, you're most welcome

[gombeggar]

r u a musician by any chance 2 have noticed the rythmn?

[Shmoke-Sifted Heftlander]

a bongo player, spoken word artist..i play other percussions too and compose occasionally..I also edit audio and video..I started playing glockenspiel but I gave my instrument away..I have a conga..i play a wood block, bucket, coffee can..I play open mics for practice with live musician..if I play enough the rhythm becomes a language for a while

[Shmoke-Sifted Heftlander]

but it's always a language in the figurative and/or invisible sense




read morebut it's always a language in the figurative and/or invisible sense

[gombeggar]

i am impressed...just a guitar player mahself but have been known to touch the bass or piano on occasion

[Shmoke-Sifted Heftlander]

I'd be a complete hack without tenacity

[Shmoke-Sifted Heftlander]

I'm just curious mostly

[gombeggar]

curiosity killed the cat but inflames the writer

[Shmoke-Sifted Heftlander]

curiousitis

[Mr Dunne Poetry]

Is this called sarcasm or your career choice?, what with poetry failing you so miserably. Aww, bless your juvenile efforts

[gombeggar]

go pout elsewhere

[Mr Dunne Poetry]

Sorry, but I'm sure you started this ;)

[gombeggar]

i'm sorry fer u...pouting child that u r...but hey continue to let all see yer smallness by all means :)

[Mr Dunne Poetry]

You started it, mate...I've just come to finish it, darling ;)

[gombeggar]

finish wut? seems ur parading around as a clown is never ending...and u seem so very good at being insecure and proclaiming it to the world why stop?

[gombeggar]

well, if u feel u must continue to parade your childish insecurities around then dance, baby

[Mr Dunne Poetry]

The only place I dance, sweetheart, is on my victims graves! Would you like to be the next victim, my poetry upsets?? ;)

[gombeggar]

ur childishness is sad and a bore...but u seem 2 care so much about showing everyone just how foolish and childish u r,so as i said cntinue to parade around and show everyone

[Mr Dunne Poetry]

No, I just wish to make you look like the talentless prick that you are :)

[gombeggar]

again u r ONLY showing EVERYONE how childish u r, but u seem to enjoy showing everyone YOUR childish insecurities repeatedly so continue

[Mr Dunne Poetry]

When you write as talented as I, insecurity is not in the dictionary. Nor is jealousy lol. I have said all I have to say.

[gombeggar]

what an interesting child he has been

[Shmoke-Sifted Heftlander]

Dunne, you used to be cool, man; what happened? why the conflict and wartime mentality...sparring is for learning, yet you spar in anger, why?

[Ees]

hmmmm, the voice of the dishwater. Nice and interesting perspective. Nice way to take us. I enjoyed reading!

"And elsewhere I’m sure to then by the very nature of things, reappear"- I like the words in that line, but it needs to be augmented slightly to flow more smoothly. Not sure how, eh, just something for you to look at once more, prob.

Anyway great poem! Creative. Enjoyable to read.

[gombeggar]

thanks much

[Peter H]

wow , the writer compares himself to sink water an excellent way to metaphorically channel yourself as something contempt . i loved the comparison in this poem it only serves to make the message more astutely understood

[gombeggar]

wow u take this deeper than the drain

[Robbie~xoxo~]

I feel this way once in a while... This is Melancholy swirl of thoughts...
Nicely penned.:)

[gombeggar]

ahh, u finally made it down the staircase ;) glad u liked it

[Robbie~xoxo~]

my pleasure... :)