Andree

A Chapter by Goddess

5 years before.

.5 YEARS BEFORE.

I’ve always wanted a real reason to be alive.
This might be the very thing, that will keep me going.

My room was nothing but a closet. A small mattress and maybe if I am lucky enough, a stack of clothing. The closet always smelled like moth balls and no matter what I did to try to stop the smell, it never worked, it just got worse.
So here I am, Andree Weskey, sitting in my room with my back against the wall. “ANDREE GET THE F**K OUT HERE!” yelled my father, probably from the living room. I rolled my eyes and leaned my head back. I had enough of my parents, I want out of this house...only if I could think of a way out without getting caught. A couple seconds later I head footsteps outside of my room. “ANDREE!” He pounds on my door. I close my eyes and try to imagine myself out of this place. To a place where things listen to me and really do listen and take what I say in to reason. A happy place.
He pounds on the door and then swings it open. With it hitting the wall. “What the hell are you doing, girl?!” he said. Oh boy, is he angry to night. His face was all red and his eyes were blood shot. I say nothing. “When are you going to start to talk again huh?! I don’t even know why I kept you, I should of given you to your drug addict mother.” He said spitting. I wanted to say, “well if she is an drug addict you are a alcoholic.” But I would never have the gut to say this and plus I have not been talking to him since my mother left.
My parents were never really parents to me. I didn’t find one ounce of love for them inside me.

“Get ‘ere!” he grabbed my arm and yanked me up. His grip was cutting off my circulation. “You little b***h, I called you and YOU were suppose to answer!” he sneered. I hold my breath and count to five, hoping this stupid life will end. He shook me and I didn’t say anything which made him even more mad so he shook me some more.
I like to pretend im some where else when this type of things happen to me. Somewhere far away from here, miles and miles away. Spreading the distance farther and farther from the yells and pain that is inflicted on me.
“I’ll teach you a lesson!” he said shaking me and then throwing me backward making me hit the wall. I felt my back crack and I wanted to cry out but I would never in front of my father.
Of everything I have learned from this type of situation is to ignore the pain that I want to scream, to let the pain numb and keep me silent.

He slammed the door behind him leaving me in stirring pain. I cough of blood. I lay down on my bed and breath in and out, trying to calm myself.

“When blood from within is shed, then within yourself you will find.”

I look around.

“Who said that!?” I whispered.

I wrapped my arms around my stomach and strained to hear something when all I could hear was a buzzing sound.
And the buzzing got louder and louder. I squeeze my eyes shut and put my hands over my ears.

They formed words, sentances, voices of every type began to talk. And they all talked at the same time. They began to mix and weave together, stringing along making nonsense. And yet they screamed at me.

“stop…stop.” I try to say but I couldn’t even hear myself. I could hear tons of voices and they kept getting louder and louder. I was on the erg of tears. “Just stop.. be..” My voice was giving out. The voices seemed to be coming closer. Ever so close, making me forget my voice. But yet I found the erge to scream on the top of my lungs, I can’t take it my ears felt like they were about to burst into flames.
The room started to spin, I felt lightheaded and the voices stayed, never getting quieter.

My hands begin to shake and they wouldn’t stay over my ears. My head was pounding and the voices were closer yet. Instead of screaming and trying to make them stop, I tried to listen. I tried to separate each voice and make out what they were saying but this just made my head hurt even more than before, making me bite my lip till it began to bleed.
Then everything died out. I open my eyes and everything slowly came back to color and there was only a small ringing in my ears.

What was that, just now?

All my pain was gone in a instant. My door swung open and there stood my father, “DON’T SCREAM GIRL!” then he slammed the door.
I stare at the door for a couple minutes and fall into a deep dreamless sleep.