Scattering

an army of ants built this hill

moved the earth and cut the door

created arteries in the copper sand

with single-minded acquiescence

 

and with one well placed footstep

I have laid waste to their divine colony

dethroned a deific queen-mother

diffusing her daughters like sundried florets

 

but if I watch them long enough

the scattering will turn to unification

tiny bodies will erase the past and rebuild

a replica of their wrecked world

 

I yearn for this resolute resiliency

ache for the ability to focus on the eventual

discarding the molded husk of memory

that flowers like violet bruises across

                        the flesh of my consciousness

Reviews

[Jack...]

Amazing, just yesterday I was standing outside with a friend, he was talking and I was watching an ant trail on the concrete admiring their hard work and dedication, their ability to function as a single unit moving in both directions, performing their duties and I thought about their world. When my friend saw me looking down, he looked as well and then with one big foot, planted it in the middle of this factory of nature. It pretty much broke my heart as I watched them "scattering" frantically and wondered what they must be thinking. I smiled as I saw them eventually fall back in line and carry on as if nothing had happened. But it had, I know they were only ants, but I felt sorry for their fallen comrades. (I am weird like that) Why did I go off on a tangent like this, hell I don't know, your poem just told the same exact story in a much more beautiful way and I loved it.

[Rita L. Sev]

Ants are amazing creatures, strong in spite of their smallness in the big world around them. So easily they are stepped on, yet they forge ahead... This is a powerful metaphor and a great piece of observation, Sarah!

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so much, Rita!

[Richard]

bee-you-ti-ful :)
so concise and so coherent and so deep
and very observant
and, I suspect, the ants will forgive you after this
it's a great metaphor
I loved it!

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Hopefully...I would hate to aggrivate them, seeing as how their chosen plot of land is so near my back door :)

[Richard]

those jerks! :)

[TL Boehm]

diffusing her daughters like sundried florets - it amazes me that you could weave a poetic thread out of - well, an anthill. Thats impressive.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Anthills have always intrigued me ;) I know, I tend to overthink, don't I? Always finding poetry...even in the trashcans. lol

[Sibling]

The ants work hard.
The ants assemble their fortress,
They create an apt kingdom for their queen,
Then she is struck down
Along with all their work by sumchin that seems
Way stronger. The ant's true strength lies in the fact that the debilitating blow doesn't matter -
They dust emselves off and start again.
The great irony is that,
This sumchin with all its might admires the humble ant,
Because in actuality,the ant has more strength.

All this from kicking an anthill?

Surely I'm impressed,well done.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Haha Yeah, I do tend to "overthink" some things :) Glad you enjoyed it!

[kublakhan27]

This piece put me in mind of childhood, when such activities carried earth-shattering significance. You've brought that significance to this poem and added a decidedly grown-up element to it, especially in the last stanza which I love to death, and relate to a great deal. You've done a wonderful job of reminding me how the simplest elements of childhood can be carried over to adulthood but are prohibited from maintaining their innocence. Lovely work my friend.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so much...you always manage to really see into my work and make me smile with your reviews. I apprecaite you...truly.

[kublakhan27]

And you know those feelings are more than mutual my friend :)

[wunder]

~“with one well placed footstep
I have laid waste to their divine colony
dethroned a deific queen-mother
diffusing her daughters like sundried florets”~

~so magnificently written Sarah~ :)

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

You humble me, thank you!

[wunder]

~so very-very welcome~ :))

[Ufi Auttorri ~ Amy C. T..]

It is said that every journey begins with a single step. In this case a not-step. Herein lies the lesson. As you and other poets (myself included) have pointed out, mostly to each other, the message is different for each reader. I would extend that to include each writer. Oh, by the way, it really is a good poem in my opinion too. Feel free to curtsey as I perform a deep bow and flourish of the metaphorical hat. :)

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

I love hat flourishing... :)

[Tom]

The ability to move on ! The little ant does not sit around feeling sorry for itself no matter how deep the inflicted wound, it shows sterling resilience and ' bounce-back-ability !

A very creative piece of poetry! Human nature can be fickle, we could learn alot from Formicidae!

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so much, Tom...glad you "got it" :)

[Talal Hussain]

Such a wonderful write
Sarah...great job :-)

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so much, my friend!

[Ken Simm.]

I think you use personal metaphor better than just about anyone else I read on here.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so much, Ken; that truly means a lot to me!