Night Terrors

This eve

water freezes in jagged patterns

on windows I keep fixed firm,

when the smoke-curl of darkness

raps with her corpse-hands,

and threatens to spirit me away.

 

This fear

tastes of perfume -- sugared aroma

followed closely by biting bitterness --

beckoning as does the sea to a child,

opening her arms gently before

towing the body into a blue-lined grave.

 

If you knew

the quickening of my breath,

and the catch of words in a throat

coated with silencing sand,

you would not ask me to unbar this dormer

and risk the theft of my sanity.

Reviews

[Frieda P]

Still trying to catch my breath with this one, I know them well and you've pen'd with that stark realism that overcomes our mind when nightfalls... brava my friend!

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you, Frieda...that means a lot to me!

[MsJewel]

Oh my!! This left me with goosebumps... This fear...beckoning as does the sea to a child, opening her arms gently before towing the body into a blue-lined grave.. a terrifying image and so brilliantly written. I'm not afraid of the dark, but I will admit, I'm glad I read this in the daylight.
Outstanding writing here..

:) Julie

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you, Julie!

[Traci]

Since I was a young child I have experienced night terrors and fear of the dark from time to time, so this piece was very relevant.

“when the smoke-curl of darkness
raps with her corpse-hands,
and threatens to spirit me away.”
You have captured the terrifying feelings, the sensation of a presence remarkably well.

“beckoning as does the sea to a child,
opening her arms gently before
towing the body into a blue-lined grave.
impending suffocation and utter helplessness, almost like being buried alive.

Many will argue that fear of the dark is a manifestation of separation anxiety disorder. I personally love the quietness, the still moments in darkness. Most of my fears come from the possible imagined dangers concealed in darkness, and not the surrounding darkness itself.

“you would not ask me to unbar this dormer
and risk the theft of my sanity.”

Like most things once you understand the physical chemistry, the illusory power is lost, and the unpleasant fears slowly diminish. However, in that very moment, one's sanity is always pondered, never risked.

So well penned dear friend. Only who who has truly experienced and understood such fears can fully capture the chilling essence that you have. Loved it, another favorite. 100/100

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so much, Traci. I feel as though you really understand my heart when it comes to my writing. You are a great shoulder to lean on and a great friend. I'm sorry I've been a little "crazy" lately with my schedule, but I will make up for it when you come visit...lunch is on me :)

[Traci]

A mutual blessing, always a pleasure to read your work, Sarah. And truly, no apology necessary. read moreA mutual blessing, always a pleasure to read your work, Sarah. And truly, no apology necessary.

[B-poet]

A very enchanting write. Loved the overall depth backed by vivid imagery here. Loved it from start to finish. Great work my fellow writing partner. A compelling read. :)

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you, my friend!

[K. Louis]

that second stanza...'as does the sea to a child, opening her arms gentle before towing the body into a blue-lined grave'...Whoa! what a simile there...what an image! THAT's chilling!

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you, K...I do love the ocean, but she is a dangerous beauty :)

[KeeD]

The smoke-curl of darkness rapes with her corpse-hands.. that sent chills down my spine, I used to be afraid of the dark so much so I wouldn't walk to the other room at night for I was afraid of the unknown, what lurked in the dark waiting for me. This poem is so well written, excellent stuff Sarah, every line is like a piece of a puzzle put together forming a masterpiece. "sugared aroma" "biting bitterness" the contrast of these two sentences work so well together ..really awesome stuff!

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so much...I guess I'm still a little afraid of the dark :)