Erosion

with one hand, you held the granulated heart

            of our beach --

black like the grit of sand scraped from paper,

or pulverized coal just beginning to form diamond dust

 

I watched it slip through your ink stained fingers

in a shocking waterfall of wasted memories

 

each grain told a story, but they were lost to the breeze --

            laced fingers and lovesick eyes,  

            abalone shells glowing iridescent

            on Moonstone Beach,  the first time

            we tasted nirvana on our tongues

nothing more now than a pile of earth at our bare feet

 

because you forgot how to pronounce my name,

and I could no longer hear your voice when I cried

 

my own hands were not enough to gather the remains

            of our broken stars --

I watched the last trace of us linger above the tide line

before returning to the earth, where stolen moments

find lasting embrace in slowly eroding shores

Reviews

[Baby Ricochet]

Sad words with great imagery. Outstanding work Sarah

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so much, my friend. Means a lot...

[GirlOnFire]

Memory is a child walking along a seashore. You never can tell what small pebble it will pick up and store away among its treasured things.

this poem is really well done , It give message to everyone

I like this Line

because you forgot how to pronounce my name,
and I could no longer hear your voice when I cried

my own hands were not enough to gather the remains
of our broken stars --
I watched the last trace of us linger above the tide line
before returning to the earth, where stolen moments
find lasting embrace in slowly eroding shores

it hits me :))

again, i enjoyed It .. :)

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

thank you so very much for reading so thoughtfully!

[Kenneth The Poet]

Memories are long, just like beaches. You cement the metaphor beautifully.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so much, Kenneth!

[Angi]

Sarah, your work is always so softly done. This piece flows so beautifully, even as the guts are spilling on the sand. You do heartbreak so well. ~sigh~ Angi~

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so very much, Angi...that means a lot to me!

[Aethereal]

This poem reads as if it were a dream. At first this dream is vivid, but it then it faded out of memory just as images in the sand form on the beach before being washed away by an oncoming tide of wakefulness.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you, my friend :)

[s y e]

" laced fingers and lovesick eyes,
abalone shells glowing iridescent
on Moonstone Beach, the first time
we tasted nirvana on our tongues"

This is such a vivid write Sarah - I can clearly see what you've written. It's amazing as always.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so much, Noodle!

[Rebecca Buller]

Such a very vivid piece and once again your brilliant wordplay has left me totally mesmerized. I can see this unfolding before my very eyes. The ending is sad, yet somehow fitting. Wonderful job, my friend:)

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so much, Rebecca!

[emmajoy]

Beautiful phrasing, a painting by words, you truly can pluck colour out of a memorable magical somewhere,

'laced fingers and lovesick eyes, ~ abalone shells glowing iridescent ~ on Moonstone Beach, the first time ~ we tasted nirvana on our tongues'

What a sadness at the end .. yet somehow, a crushed but sweet fragility

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so much, Emma!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

shores, erosion, our beach...damn...again you amaze me...the poems that gather together the imagery of love, water...the writer spewing waves of words against a dispirited shore.

really good stuff..

i just get mesmerized reading you...and sigh.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Thank you so much, Jacob...coming from you, that is truly humbling!