Look

Look

A Poem by Gillzy
"

I was just looking at my surroundings when I was in a lecture.

"

What can you see?

"Brown chairs,
Bored kids,
A stupid lecturer."

No... Really...
What can you see?


"The thrones on which we sit
Everyday - leading us all to our kingdom.
Crowning us all the Royalty of Learning."

What else? Look closely.

"A sea of heads - bobbing.
Swimming in knowledge.
Vigilantly listening,
Or silently sleeping.
Unseen, unnoticed."

And now?

"The worlds more open.
The squawks from the front,
Soar,
Hovering in the air.
Waiting for a signal that they
Want to be received.
Then they jet down,
Coming in to land on
The runways of our minds."

Do you understand me now?
The world's more than it seems.
Just open your eyes.
Look.

© 2008 Gillzy


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Reviews

nothing is what it seems, its amazing what you can see when your not even looking for it

Posted 17 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Interesting poem. It sounds as if you thirst for knowledge, but do not enjoy the lecturer. That is a sad turn of events if it is true. I love the imagry that you interject into this piece. I found it very enjoyable. Keep up the great work

Posted 17 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Gillzy, stop saying it's rubbish! It's not!Interesting approach here. It's like two speakers. You have a Greek chorus going on here. Have you been reading Sophocles or Euripides? I thought that clever.Now this was a little vague: "The thrones on which we sit Everyday - leading us all to our kingdom. Crowning us all the Royalty of Learning." The problem I'm having is mostly to the last. I can accept the "thrones" image and the "kingdom" of knowledge image, but the "royalty" image is perhaps pushing the metaphor a bit too much. Unless it's tempered with sarcasm.One thing you'll want to consider, Gillzy, is the progressions. Each grouping is missed with contradictory images and thoughts. Learning is stupid. Learning is the crown. The teacher is stupid and the students bored. Learning can take you away out of yourself. The problem with the mix is that at the end, it never really went anywhere. If you start with one or the other hold the pessimistic or optimistic view and progress to the other. This gives the piece a movement or progression. With the ending you seem to want to make it optimistic, so hold a strong pessimistic start and progress from there. Does that make sense?You see, I'm starting to read into your words deeper meanings, which says to mean you are really starting to develop as a poet. ;-)Cheers!Rob

Posted 17 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on August 7, 2008

Author

Gillzy
Gillzy

Scotland, United Kingdom



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