Self-possession

Very messy poem. My expression of anger towards individuals. I think it's probably hard to read and understand but that's what makes it so expressive. Some stanzas are directed at specific people.

The edges have faded now
I'm further away but we all know
No- I know- how fast I could stumble in any direction
"Put your weapons down"
Know that I'm play fighting
You know it's only play fighting
Even after seeing-

DO YOU KNOW the games I used to play?
Slicing through a few layers of an onion's skin place no tears on my face
A pink pansy petal promise to every inch of my limbs
I walked around those flower beds, I saw it all. I. Saw it all.
But I only photographed one of the four sections. (Only one limb)

Hello again and again and again
Oh a happy voice for you.
And again goodbye goodbye goodb-y-e.
I'm just a curly haired version of every person IN THE ENTIRE WORLD who you like
Please like me please just like me
Please stop strangling me with irises
Everybody knows that teeny tiny piece who runs around recklessly
Bumping into everything, knocking people over
They know it's me
they already know they do I promise you.
I used to laugh
At the spilled black ink
It was oh so close to me, the single thing that barred me from a collapsing future
I misused it
I let it separate, fall apart
I abused it
You see, I know how you felt.
Further

Away now.
And further from my father
Who drenched the air sodden
Who put dark tinted glass in the child skies
So that his hair and clothes could appear a darker shade.
WELL I'm not quite far enough.
When I was younger, not realising that it was actually something that people do
I did it
And I liked it and now other people do it
But it is my thing it is my thing to do.

I see the mess Nestling into my skin just below my lower eyelashes,
On my asymmetric limbs,
Wedged in between my teeth,
Splattered on my scalp.
I see the mess, Devil of my dreams
that I picked at and picked at AND F*****G PICKED AT
Until my hands were full and my energy inside out. My energy inside out.
Devil of my dreams- went searching in laughs and stumbles
For it all
You gathered your mess back up.
Wasted effort of mine
Oh oh ohhhh what a waste of energy I didn't have.
For your sake, I wish to wrap you in bubble wrap and sunshine
For my sake, I wish to scream until your whole glass soul has shattered.

A bad disease that is clearly not part of my blood.
I'm so messy I always have been .
I could go on and on and on
About goodbye goodbye goodbye
About my hellish fingertips
About claiming things as my own
About narcissistic materialistic- secretly optimistic- b******s
About faded black blocks and faded faded edges--
The voices of two thousand and thirteen.
(Did that year happen?)
I may as well skip to two thousand and fourteen now
And make you b******s fade, instead.

Reviews

[613]

This was written exceptionally well. I am glad I stumbled upon this!

- Brittney

[Mahlo Metsys]

Very creative. Great detail with analogies and metaphors and there seems to be a hint of wordplay throughout as well. I've known a lot of other writers who write angry and get too carried away with how they feel and lose track of the poetry. Not in this case. Impressive work.