Erosion

Consciousness twisting and melting
I forgot what I used to be
before this place and
before this time.
I know I had a home once
long ago
before
this.
I remember my family
my kids and my wife
many
many
years ago.
This shed is my home
slow melodic music
always drumming and thumping in my mind
a never ending track of
losing ones reality.
Days spent looking
into the sun
for answers
or for questions
I can't remember anymore.
It was long ago
I came here
with something heavy and wet
I remember
dirt
and sadness.
I don't know what their faces look like anymore.
Did they ever have faces?

I don't remember
hitting them
yet they were always bloodied and
bruised.
I don't remember yelling
yet they were always crying.
Our last day together
was inside the car
parked not that far away.

I found my child's book and her purse
but they were long gone?
To where, I wonder?

Endlessly I search the woods each day
for anything to remember.
Before sunset
one chilly evening
I found two scary lumps in the
earth.
With my shovel I prodded and dug
spraying dirt.
I found them, sleeping
so still
within the cold soil,
I couldn't believe what I had done.

Tears mixed with dust as I covered
their lonely bones
my heart was gone.
I had
left it there
with them.

Consciousness twisting and melting
I forgot what I used to be
before this place and
before this time.
I know I had a home once
long ago
before
this...

Author's Note

This is about dementia. I don't expect positive reviews, as it was penned on a whim. Anything helps though.