The day I fall in love

When my hearts love button is finally pressed

The day I fall in love

I can almost imagine the day I will fall in love. The sun will be shining bright illuminating the blue sky and warming up the earth for the best love story ever. The summer flowers will be in full bloom and their fragrance will awaken my desire to dance to the sun. The butterflies will be flapping their wings in rhythm exposing the beauty within, almost as if aware of the love story in the make.
My heart will be beating faster than usual in pure anticipation. In some way, fate will have scribbled the importance of the day somewhere in my heart. My mouth will murmur along to the chirping of the birds in the beat of the most beautiful love song;

‘So, Honey, now
Take me into your loving arms
Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars
Place your head on my beating heart
I’m thinking out loud
Maybe we found love right where we are’

From a far I will notice him walking towards me, he will be simply dressed I imagine- maybe in shorts and red T shirt. He will notice me noticing him and I will instantly shy away, my eyes will light up, my stomach will flutter and I will hope that he notices me too.

The wind will then blow gently and I will try to hold on to my yellow floral dress. Then I will lose my balance and feel myself falling. Cussing under my breath I will try not to make a fool out of myself by struggling to prevent the fall. At that instant, I will feel his hands holding me steadily, and he will say something that I probably won’t hear as I will be deeply staring into his eyes. Then in his heart I will scribble a future; a lovely one full of love, three young boys, a beautiful home and a dog named Max.

Author's Note

Open for reviews

Reviews

[barleygirl]

You painted a word picture that's very compelling. Most of all, I love that everything described here is imaginary -- only in the narrator's mind. I like that you start out describing many lovely things about the natural world that reflect the sweetness of this moment being anticipated. I also like the way your story turns into a poem for a bit . . . lyrical fantasy of how that first conversation might be. Most of all, I like that you describe this sensation of "almost falling" & then being caught by "him" (nicely detailed) . . . this idea is a dynamic & interesting way to show us the sensations of "falling in love" as if it were a physical event happening to this person.

Even tho I enjoyed reading the beginning imagery of nature, it could be a little more original by choosing ideas that aren't often used in love poems -- like bright shining blue sky with butterflies -- this is cliché (used often). I encourage you to select ideas that are not as common, like maybe there are flaming clouds framing a fiery sunset . . . or maybe dragonflies instead of the often-used butterflies. Just some ideas for expanding your vision. There are so many love poems written, we writers must always try to stay away from clichés, so our descriptions don't sound like every other love story.