Awakening

Raphael wakes to find himself in hospital with a new set of challenges.

Waking is a strange experience, most especially if you’ve never done it before.  Until now there had been no need for Raphael to sleep or rest.  I tried to tell them… didn’t I? Or did I? Things were so jumbled in his mind.  Angels were supposed to be tireless, ageless.   Yet here Raphael lay on a bed of white with needles coming out of his arm and uncomfortable things stuck to his chest waking from a very deep sleep. 

It’s no wonder so many mortals awake upset.  The disorientation alone was terrifying.  Why do my limbs feel so heavy? As if they were being weighed down by some invisible force.  And my head… it felt so light he feared it might float away.  An insistent beeping sound coming from somewhere to the left jarred him from the inside out.  I feel so breathless.  He felt as if he were running, yet he hadn’t moved.  The room around him was, though.  Swaying back and forth, turning in circles so violently that Raphael had to close his eyes to steady himself.

“Give it a second, sweetheart.  The meds haven’t quite worked their way out of your system yet.  It’ll be a little while before you get your land legs back.”  A warm voice spoke through the fog that enveloped him.  There had been so many faceless voices since being pulled aboard the fisherman’s trolley.  It annoyed him to no end that he was not able to operate his own body well enough to properly see.  Cracking open one eye he attempted to locate this new voice’s source.  Through the tiny slit his dry, scratchy eye would allow, he could vaguely make out the deep contrast of dark coffee on crisp white linen. 

“The lights too bright for you darlin’?  I can turn ‘em down ‘till you wake up a little more if you like.”  This voice had an uncanny ability to read minds.  He was certain of it the moment the lights began to dim.  “Thank you.”  His eyes weren’t the only parts of his body that were dry.  How difficult could it be for two simple words to move past his lips?  Very. He answered himself after struggling to work them out across cracked lips. 

“Don’t you think anything of it.  It’s my job, after all.  Now how about something nice and cool to drink, hm? Nothing too fancy on tap for you just yet but you can have some water or juice.  You’re gonna want to rehydrate after drinking in all that salt water.”  The woman was correct, of course.  His foray into the ocean to retrieve Catherine had cost him dearly.  There wasn’t even the smallest part of his body that did not remember being beneath the waves, or worse still being in that net.  Needless to say, the memories were not fond.

“The doc says you’re to stay right in that bed until he gets the chance to look you over again now that you’re conscious.  You’re not in fantastic shape but you’re healthy and your injuries aren’t severe.  Play your cards right and I’m pretty sure you’ll be just fine.”

“But…”  He had more pressing concerns than whether or not he would be alright.  “What about Catherine?”  The croak of his own voice was frustrating, if only because it made it so difficult to ask all of the questions that were racing through his mind.  Had the men on the boat managed to keep her heart beating?  Was she still breathing?  Would she be alright?  Was there anyone watching over her to prevent her from doing something incredibly foolish like trying to end her life, again?  There were too many questions and not nearly enough answers for his liking at this point.  

“Catherine?  Ah, so that’s what her name is.  Can’t say I pictured her as a Catherine, but I suppose it fits.  She a friend of yours ?”

“Of sorts.”  Even in his foggy state he knew how important it was that he be cautious now.  Humans had all sorts of made up rules, and he wasn’t sure what kind of water he was treading.  One false step and they could refuse to allow him to see her.  “Is she… were they able to help her?”

“Don’t you worry about a thing, sugar.  She’s on the mend.  The doctor is watching her pneumonia pretty closely. She’s developed a bit of a fever and a bad chest cough but considering the alternative I’d say she’s doing just fine.”  Thank you Father, for sparing her life.  I don’t know what I would have done if… The thought didn’t bear finishing. 

“That’s some elaborate costume you’ve got on, by the way.  Those wings must be getting pretty uncomfortable by now.  We would have taken them off of you when they wheeled you in but we couldn’t quite figure out how you’d managed to glue them on.  The doctors figured it was better to leave them on then risk hurting you any more by trying to take them off.”  Her eyes drifted from the wings visible over the edges of his shoulders to the myriad of colored splotches along the length of his arms and across his chest.  Are those bruises? How curious. “Costume?” How strange that these people would assume such nonsense.

“Yeah.  It must’ve been one hell of a party, if everyone was dressed like you.  Nothing but a pair of wings and a white sheet to cover your bits and bobs.”  Her smile was innocent enough but the gleam of mischief in her eye was impossible to mistake.  Raphael had to wonder what exactly was wrong with his choice of dress.  Not that it (or his pounding head and sore throat) mattered much when there were more pressing matters at hand. 

“Where is she?”  It was hard just to move.  The very space around him seemed to push back as he tried to sit upright and swing his heavy legs over the side of the bed.  Clearly things had changed in the short time since he’d come to Earth.  He was changing.  It seemed that while his capacity for emotion had evolved greatly, physically he had developed some very serious challenges.  None of it would deter him.  All that mattered was Catherine.

“She’s just down the hall.”  Firm, capable fingers skittered across his skin, checking that the machinery was properly attached.  “Now you’d best lay back and take it easy.” She ordered him, pulling up the blanket and tucking him firmly into it. “Those are the doctor’s orders.  I’ll come and get you when Catherine’s ready for visitors.”  Unacceptable! He wanted to shout at the nurse.  He wanted to throw off the blanket that held him in place and he wanted to run to her bedside. He wanted to sit next to her if only to watch the steady rise and fall of her chest and bear witness to the simple miracle of her breath.  Strange… Angels do not want, and yet I do…

He wanted many things but would be left wanting.  Unfortunately his traitorous body had other plans that did not involve the fulfillment of his wishes.  He had full control of his hands, which were pulling at the strange discs stuck to his skin.  The very ones the nurse had secured only moments before.  He would not be able to leave the room, possibly even the bed, until they were dislodged. 

While his fingers were nimble, the other parts of his body had discovered a will of their own.  “I want…” he wanted to get up, but his eyes had closed of their own volition and would not reopen.  “Hold on there, Romeo.  Leave those right where they are.  You’re exhausted, and rightly so after that dangerous little swim.”  The woman’s dark hands covered his own, stilling them in their haste to remove the foreign objects.  “I think you’ve had enough excitement for one day, darlin’.  Look at you: can’t even keep your eyes open.  Rest, okay?  I promise the world will still be there when you wake up again.”

There was no argument in Heaven or on Earth for those wise words, and even if there were he could not have applied it.  Trapped as he was in his own body, all he could do was succumb to the exhaustion that overwhelmed him once more.

*** 

“Did you get a name Luce?”  There was a buzz of anticipation around the nurse’s station that started as soon as Lucinda came out of the John Doe’s room.  The handsome, mysterious stranger was awake and they all wanted details. 

“I got one for the girl.  Her name’s Catherine.  Apparently they’re friends ‘of sorts’. Whatever that meants.”

“Of sorts?” One of the candy stripers asked. 

“I have no idea.  Tall and groggy in there didn’t specify.  Just wanted to know how Catherine was.  How is she, anyway?  Awake yet?”  As interested as Luce was in the handsome John Doe, there was still work to be done.

“Nope, still out cold.  Fever’s no better either.  It’s not looking good.”  The answer came as no surprise, given the woman’s circumstances.  That didn’t mean Luce liked it.  There was nothing she hated more than finding out she may have lied to a patient. She wasn’t the only one to feel that way either.  There was a collective sigh as the group of women pondered the possibility that the man’s efforts to save his Catherine might have been for nothing.  Luce wasn’t one to dwell on negatives, though.  A little positive thinking, a little faith that things would work out for the best and there was hope for any situation.  “Well, maybe we’ll get lucky and one of them will wake up long enough to tell us what happened out there.” 

Sure, and maybe there would be a miracle that would take away Catherine’s fever so she could heal up properly.  Because that’s exactly the type of thing that happened every single day, right?  Sure.

And with that she scattered the group, efficiently delegating patient charts and cleaning duties to the ladies under her supervision.

Just down the hall, an orderly wheeled his cleaning cart unnoticed into the room of the man the nurses had just been discussing.  Stepping up to the bedside he looked upon the unconscious man.  Carefully, he brushed a lock of hair away from his forehead as a parent would a small child.  “I know this is already difficult Raphael, but the most important things always are.”  Raphael began to stir restlessly as if he’d heard the words spoken.  Perhaps he had. 

 Gabriel took a moment to monitor the machines attached to his older brother and to read the paperwork at the end of his bed.  He had to be sure all was well before moving on to his next task.  Satisfied that his brother had not been gravely injured, he moved to the foot of the bed and sat. 

“You made the right choice, brother.”  The words were spoken conversationally, punctuated with a familiar pat on the thigh as if Raphael were awake and able to answer him.  The one sided nature of their talk was a little disconcerting, but not unbearably so.  “I’m here for you this time, brother.  My job is to make sure you don’t fail.  A ridiculous concept, as I’ve never once known you to do so.  Still, humanity has a very distinct need to be reminded that they are not alone.  You’ve been changing for quite some time now, becoming more like the lambs we shepherd.”  Sighing deeply he took Raphael’s closest hand in both of his own.  “I miss talking with you, Raphe.  Please remember, you are not alone brother.  You might not see me but I am here with you.” 

Perhaps Raphael could hear him after all.  The restlessness that had him tossing lightly in sleep stilled with the sound of Gabriel’s voice and the words of comfort and encouragement he offered.  Yes, that was better.  Now Raphael would be able to rest easily and recover the strength he would need to face this foreign world and the terrifying changes it would bring. 

The nurses never noticed the young orderly as he left nor did they see him abandon his cart by the door to the stairwell.  Gabriel slipped away completely unnoticed.

***

The next time Raphael woke it was quite a different experience.  Gone were the grogginess and the weighty feeling that the drugs had provided.  One moment he was oblivious to the world and the next he was almost painfully aware of it.  The transition was so fast and so complete that it startled poor Lucinda, the nurse who was once again checking on his vitals. 

“Catherine?”  He was sitting up, pulling off the sticky discs (successfully this time) from his chest.  Luce had just enough time to pull the iv catheter out of his arm before he got up off the bed completely.  “And where the hell do you think you’re going?”  She was looking him up and down with the interest of an angry mother to a naughty child, as if amused that he might actually be considering leaving the room as he was. 

“Where is Catherine? Is she still ‘down the hall’, as you said?” He had one hand on the door knob, the other was scratching at his scalp.  “Yeah honey, she’s still down the hall.  You might want to rethink things first though.  You sure you want to go to her right this second?”

“Yes.  Why?”  There was something about the way she’d asked, as if he was missing something important that should have been incredibly obvious.

“Well, I can only make a suggestion here, but how about I get you some pants before you leave the room?  I’d really rather not have you causing a stir, getting my nurses all riled up walking through the halls naked but for those wings on your back.”  Right.  Clothes.  They were important here.  “Will it take very long to get them?”

He couldn’t understand why she would be shaking her head, smirking to herself as she turned away.  “No more than a few seconds darlin’.  I’ve got a couple of pairs in the drawer here that’ll probably fit you.”  They weren’t anything pretty, just the usual one-size-fits-all powder blue hospital pajama pants.  They fit and that was all that mattered.  He’d barely pulled them up around his hips and he was already walking through the door once again intent on finding Catherine.

He got halfway down the hall when it hit him that he had no idea where she was.  Coming to a sudden stop he looked around, confused.  He should be able to feel her.  He should just know where to find her.  That he didn’t, couldn’t no matter how hard he tried, was enough to scare him so that he was frozen.  Luckily Lucinda was there, in the doorway behind him, a mysterious force, guiding him to his destination.  “Room 402, just to your left over there.  I’ll be joinin’ you in a minute so don’t go anywhere y’hear?” 

Suddenly he felt frantic.  It was indescribable other than to say he just didn’t feel ‘right’.  In fact, he was positive he wouldn’t feel ‘right’ again until he was at Catherine’s side.  And once he reached his destination, mere feet away from her bedside, nothing else mattered.  It was as if he was still there, in the ocean, being battered by the raging tides.  So many emotions swept through him that he couldn’t begin to name them all.  Approaching on shaking legs, he didn’t dare believe his eyes for fear they might be betraying him.  Catherine. Unconscious yes, and if the machines beeping beside them were to be believed, undeniably alive. 

She still fought the fever Lucinda had mentioned, it showed in the bright pink flush on her cheeks that did nothing to ease her pallor.  The crisp while linen sheets where she lay had more color than her skin had seen in months.  She is a miracle. He was sure of it.  And so was the moment she first felt his presence, turning to him even in her unconscious state.  Cracking his knees on the cold tile as his legs gave way beneath him he paid homage to her the only way he knew how.  Taking her closest hand in both of his, Raphael bowed his head and prayed.  Thank you, Father. Thank you for not taking her from me.  Forehead pressed to the mattress beside her he wept the silent tears of relief.

***

Reviews

[Seren]

Awww, Gen this was so sweet, hun! Favourite line is the last, the silent tears of relief. And I liked the levity in it, too, from those bawdy nurses at their station and Raphael trying to step out in his birthday suit! ^_^'