Justin

"Justin.

What felt like seconds now feels like years

A few months and days together, now you're with me for eternity

Your image ingrained in every fiber of my being

Your life so tragically ended, but your death breathed life into me

All my life I waited for a love that would change me for the good

I never dreamed how that change would take place

Never dreamed it would arrive from horror

I was a lifeless, drunkard-pissing life away with every sip

You saw what was behind all the demise, you reached out to me

You fought through my cobwebs, you climbed my walls

You nursed my dying body and soul to no avail

All the while you were fighting your own demons and nightmares

Not to be noticed by me, engulfed in poisoning my body instead

I didn't see you, not like you saw me- absorbed me

As i sift through the debris, I remember things I ignored

I see the signs of a tormented heart and soul, I see the cries for help

Drowning in my own sickness, I was depleted of empathy and true caring

Seeing you dangling in the distance, my heart shattered, my trance broken

Determined to not let your death be in vain, i picked up your sword

I began to swing at the haunted rooms of my mind and heart

Many times ive fallen down for the loss of you and the pain that it could be my fault

But soon your strength lifts me back up to face another challenge and prevail

Slips here and there, but ultimately, my life has been saved

Mother to my children, daughter to my mother, friend to my friends

Surrounded by a new village and other soldiers of the universe

Connections made that without your sacrifice i would never have been blessed

Not now not ever will i let your memory fade

Every step forward I bring you with me, beside me and inside my heart

I cherish the moments the butterflies fill my insides when your near

I long for the day i join you in the universe again”