A belly size hole

Missing mum

I have an emptiness inside, a belly size hole
that if not there would contain my grieving bile.
It has been close to 10 weeks since mum passed,
weeks that now seem like years such is my missing..
Tears stain my cheeks as I tap out my pain,
unexpected, sore tears, that run freely
as those that I love deeply sleep soundly above me.
Outside rain falls incessantly
silencing the usual cacophony of crow and magpie,
these seemingly vying to control the airwaves
in an irksome, early summers morning ritual that would rouse the dead,
if only that were true...
I sigh and inwardly berate myself,
tell myself to get a grip,
that moping will change nowt
and the tears I shed will do nothing but make me feel even more tired than I already do.
And with that thought rattling around my head I finish up,
tap out a last few words, and apply a heart broken full stop.

Author's Note

Just feeling sad :((
Disjointed I know but that's how I feel.

Reviews

[Vertigo Cat1111]

I'm so, so sorry for your loss. I hope you're doing alright, and taking care of yourself, as impossible as that seems. Your words are very beautiful though, and I hope you know I'm sure she'd be so proud of you. Just don't be mad at yourself if your sad and don't rush it, because while there is a grieving process, the grief never truly ends, but it will get better. I'm sure she was an amazing human being, and she created someone with such talent and a hardworking mind. Your poem was beautiful. It definitely hurts, but you know it's gotten a bit better when you smile when you think about her.

[Gee]

Thank you, appreciate your kind words

[Kelly Scheppers]

It doesn't matter how old we are when we lose a parent. We become orphans, in trying to cope with the grief and overwhelming loss. My Mother was my last surviving parent, so losing her made quite an impact on my life - and it still does, even today. There's no time limit to grief. Some people handle it better than others, but that's no reason for you to feel the need to apologize for missing this extraordinary woman. Allow yourself time to grieve for her memory, for in time, it will comfort you more than it hurts you - now. Many blessings, Gordon!

[Gee]

Thank you kindly Kelly :)
Hope you are well

[Lorry]

Apologies for missing this one Gee, i must have been on one of my sabatt... Sabbatic... Breaks away from the cafe.
Days, even hours feel like years while we wonder where all those years went.
Moping may not solve anything, but it does show how deeply their passing is felt.
No one knows a boy like his Mum and we know no one like her, the person that has been there for us from day one, strengthening that bond until it is unbreakable.
A beautiful memorial to a deeply missed Mum. Beautiful.

[Gee]

Thanks Lorry. Already been 7 months since she shuffled off, can smile now when thinking about her, well, most of the time.
Hope all is well with you North of the border :))

[Lorry]

Well cold, i can tell you that much 😀
Ps... Im not gonna jinx you this year, but i reckon winning the league on the final day by goal difference over city is on the cards 😀

[Gee]

I'd settle for that :))

[Beccy]

No matter the physical presence, the bond of love remains with us always. Your poem is a necessary catharsis; a purification of sorts, which is so very vital for the purgation of grief.

Though both mum and dad are still with me, I can completely empathise with your loss, as some years ago I lost my beloved grandma, (nanny goggles,) so called by my sister and I because of the over large, pink plastic NHS glasses she insisted on wearing, (mostly on her forehead.) :))

From an early age she would read to me, mostly the English Romantics which she adored; encourage me to write and it was through her that I came to love poetry; and I miss her still so very much.
From time to time though and mostly when I am writing, I can sense her presence, encouraging me me as she did when I was a child. It mitigates the loss, makes me know how fortunate I was to have her in my life, which is totally, I am sure, how you feel about your mum.

I found the penultimate verse of your poem so very touching; and those four simple little words, 'heart broken full stop,' cut so very deep.

Beccy.

[Gee]

Hi Beccy, thanks. It's nice you have such find memories of your man and that she was instrumental in you being the talented writer that you are. Hope you are both well.

[Neville]

I understand precisely where you are coming from, heartfelt and true &.. I do feel for you my friend

[Gee]

Thanks Neville, appreciate that :)

[augustus]

At my age (82) it makes one realise just how little time is left for simple pleasures. One thing is certain I 'ain't going to stop writing rubbish!

[Gee]

Lol, plenty of rubbish for us all to write :))

[Tinabells]

You have a strong will Gee. Cheer up and continue to inspire more writers!

[Gee]

Thank you Tina

[Ken Simm.]

The old saw it takes time is true. Think be lucky you had her. And perhaps think what she would say to you now.
Feel better in your own time my friend.

[Gee]

Good morning Ken, hope all is well with you.
Very lucky indeed to be raised by such a woman, who if alive would kick my arse and tell me to get on with my life :) Difficult though.
Thank you for your kind words

[Coyote Poetry]

I do understand the poem. Somedays, hard to get out of bed. I miss the voices of my mentors and I hear their words when I am weak. Get-up and go forward. Sometime we need strong coffee and to find a place we enjoy. I hope you are feeling better my friend.
Coyote

[Gee]

Mum would be giving me a kick up the arse and telling me to move on, easier said than done though.read moreMum would be giving me a kick up the arse and telling me to move on, easier said than done though.
Thank you Coyore

[Gee]

Coyote .....

[Coyote Poetry]

But we must. My grandmother was the same. Told us the truth.

[Paul Bell]

When the greatest part of your life dies, it's like dying yourself.
Disjointed is probably the perfect word. Walking about in the wilderness a close second.
But it's the job your mum did on you that makes the person. That's the real pride when you lose someone.
The great memories will always be there.

[Gee]

Indeed
Cheers Paul