Alive but not living.

Living after the death of a life-long love

In armchair old his body slumped
beside the unlit fire,
in a rested state, serenaded by
that evenings crickets choir.

Old and weary, bathed and clean
fresh clothes against his skin,
a hearty meal he'd tiredly ate
lay heavy deep within.

His age lined face, sun baked and dry,
fatigued, tired eyes half shut,
a ribbon red on jaw line shaved
where carelessly he'd cut.

Strains of "their" song filled the air
a smile played 'cross his lips,
he pictured his wife of fifty years
as she was all breasts and hips.

A tear he wiped from parchment cheek
a tear of loss and love,
two years now since she left his arms
to wait for him above.

Two years alive not living
he wanted off life's ride,
ready now in prayer he'd asked
to be taken to her side.

Author's Note

Might have tenses muddled,confuse myself at times

Reviews

[Cherry Pepperweb]

I feel this one. You have a way of touching the soul through your words.

[Gee]

Thanks,your very kind......

[Cherry Pepperweb]

You're welcome Mr. G. :)

[Woody]

I am flabbergasted that this sprouted from the same head that produces the hilarious writes I know.
wonderful, Gee. a very moving piece and so well penned (though I'm no poetry critic).
amazing stuff!!

[Gee]

Cheers Woody,appreciate the kind review.I think my schizophrenic twin writes the sensible stuff

[Woody]

aah the picture's much clearer now.

[andrew mitchell]

A classic solid porridge of a write Gee,more serious and reflective in tone == a change is noted! excellent work! Where's the seconds!!

[Gee]

MORE,MORE,get back to your seat Oliver........

[andrew mitchell]

But Sir!! Sir you said.... lol

[Arunima]

WOW.. could feel the deep-seated grief...:(

[Gee]

Cheers phoenix

[sereenaoutloud]

you create such great imagery in this piece, you can see the man like a fly on the wall watching !

[Su' Nacnetaf]

Very poignant, sad, sweet. I thoroughly liked this piece of yours, wonderfully written. I really don't know what else to say other than how much I liked it. Thanks for sharing, kudos.

[Gee]

Thank you,I'm chuffed you enjoyed the read.

[MoriartyMesa]

Where I cook, I see a lot of elderly folk. But these always mange to bring a smile to my face. And I hear a lot of stories, and this is one to note.


Nice job Fella.

[Gee]

Thanks,must be quite an emotional rollercoaster.

[Mae Vande Guchte]

Wow. I will never be this good at writing. I love it.

[Gee]

I'm glad you liked the poem.This style of poem pales into insignificance when put along side some of the poems posted by the truly talented poets that use this site,but saying that I'm not here to compete,I enjoy my simple wee efforts and I suppose that's all that really matters.Don't ever put yourself down,write and post until your hearts content and like all of us learn from those that are more talented.

[Mae Vande Guchte]

Thank you.

[Gee]

My pleasure

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Really beautiful, just breathtaking.
I truly loved this, reminded me of my old poem timeless love.
Same topic.
So romantic but so sad. Lol very emotional piece.
Quite moving.
I really enjoyed this

[Gee]

Why thank you kind lady

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

you are more than welcome :)

[Chaos_Collector]

Your wordplay enamors me. I love the way you've worded this poem and detailed it. It's sad to see people like this. They have nothing to look forward to and nothing to live for. They merely exist without drive to carry them on to the horizen of the morrow. I enjoyed the read :)

[Gee]

As I enjoyed your review.Thank you

[Chaos_Collector]

You're welcome Gee (: