What It Takes To Reach A Conclusion. . .

A humorous short story.

For a little man driving his little car down the freeway, it had been a very bad year. First, he lost his job. Second, went the wife and kids, and thirdly, this day would be the last day before the IRS took his home. It seemed to this unfortunate man that fate was utterly against him enjoying his life. . . 

Now, on his way back from a scheduled appointment with his therapist, he couldn't help contemplate suicide. 

"It'll all be okay", the therapist had said, "Things will get better, just give it time. . . " But he felt that he didn't have any more time. What would happen next? his health? and so for the first time in a very long time he prayed aloud to a god that he wasn't sure existed.

Even to himself, it all seemed much like bribery. "Please" was a word that he used over and over at this time, and when no response came, he wiped away his tears and tried not to hit any other cars.

"I guess, I'll just kill myself" he thought, "I'll go home right now, and kill myself. . . "

He stopped at a red light, and he offered himself once more, "God, if you don't answer me. . . then I'm going to kill myself, you hear me! and it'll be all your fault!"

But no reply came. . .

Just as he was turning to the right, down the same old road leading to his soon to be repossessed home, he saw a billboard in the corner of his eye. It must be new, he thought as he slowed down, to get a better look at it. It was a new advertisement by Nike, and written in bold-print was their famous motto: "Just Do It".

It must be a sign from God, he thought.

And so, when the little man driving his little car reached his home- he did just that. The next day four men from the IRS came to take away his home, and what they found as they ventured inside was a little man hanging from many Nike shoe laces. When all was said and done, they took those too. . . 

Author's Note

Comment & Review

Reviews

[Samuel Dickens]

I think I found more irony than humor, but then, we don't all have the same sense of humor. This is very well-written.

[Gedalya]

I'd much rather have people read my professional stories, LoL The ones that are well thought out and took much time to write. This came to me in about the time it takes to seat a fly, including writing it down. I have tried magical realism, but good grief it's difficult to characterize an inanimate object.

[Gedalya]

I find it equally interesting. Maybe, it was. . . It's a conspiracy. I should have introduced that into the story with a bit of metafiction. Do something like Philip K. Dick and have a satellite act on the part of god's behalf.

[Gedalya]

New writers always wonder how to come up with a story. It's really as easy as putting a few random ideas together and trying to get them to communicate with each other. This story in particular may be a bit green, lol

[Gedalya]

I love using neurotics. I've known so many oddball people. . . Yeah, I wanted there to be a connection between him asking God for relief, and then ironically he sees the billboard. lol It's an old joke I use to tell, but I said "Hey, why not throw into a small- 500wd or so story". Most of my stories are extremely outlined and only occasionally do I get a break from it, with small bits like this.

[Gedalya]

I could have easily spent more time on this, but I really just wanted to connect the two dots:
Suicide + Nike's "Just Do It". That to me was the most important aspect. I've taken my stories too serious at times, but in between major works I tend to create fragments and prototypes, sometimes they're useful other times not. I'm still trying to break into publishing my work online. I've got stockpiles of stories, and some are still shopped out and well, I can't touch those. So, here is something I scraped together to throw out there. lol