Just Before Zero

6am. Wake up. Horror.

Brush teeth, freshen face.

Doubt belief. Straighten faith.

Just have to get on with it.

It's got to be done.

Check the time: 0609.

Shower? Rush.

No time. Bus.

Dress. To kill.

Dying to eat.

Breakfast. Tea.

Look. Don't see.

Function body.

Focus mind. 0639.

Don't think! Don't think!

Just stay in line.

In a mere half an hour

More worry lines growing.

And two more years of your age

is showing. Then 0648.

You better get going!

Got everything? Check.

And an aching neck.

Forget it. It's old.

Just have to get on with it.

It's got to be done.

Outside there's no sun

though the day has begun.

It's 0654. God! Open the door!

Six minutes. Check. I'm cutting it fine.

One last look around. One final time.

At all that is mine.

I really must go.

The clock on the wall

-I wish it wasn't so-

Marks my heart, ticks its beat.

I'm a watch-maker's meat.

I wish it meant nothing.

And I wish I could stay.

Sit all day at the table

staring into its face.

Relaxed by its movement.

Following its trace.

Careless and carefree.

No debt or cold sweat.

No morning or evening.

No deadline, no fretting. 

No fetching or getting.

No want and no need.

I will never be freed!

I'm a victim, a seed

of someone else's greed.

A fat man with a bomb

from a movie long-gone.

I'm the nick-of-time hero

and just before zero

I snip the right wire

Get the girl I desire

Save the world from destruction.

I'm a pawn of construction.

The champion of the system.

A man with Its mission.

The show must go on.

Just have to get on with it.

It's got to be done.

Work. Factory. Office.

Metropolis. Necropolis.

Clock watches.

Hands. Faces.

Check gauges.

Chain-gang of Ages.

Pressure. Raises.

Day-dreaming. Time? 0709!

For The Grand Design

from which one day I'll die

I'm destined to be late.

It was always my fate.

Reviews

[Sweet_pale_cacophony]

You always come up with something new and so very fresh..This was very very fast paced,the reader was with you all along.No one holds the attention with their words as you do,you have such a skilled grip on your words and such finesse..from the starting till the end.
We are such vulnerable victims of time and our demanding lifestyle that even we don't realize how we have become so..This seemed more to me like a Monday..oh but then i have a special dislike for em days but yes the way you begin..Doubt belief. Straighten faith.
Just have to get on with it.
It's got to be done...this reminds me of my Monday morning reassurance rambling to myself.Then again..More worry lines growing.
And two more years of your age
is showing...oh how i love this phrase as it leaps on to 6.48..I like the poem more when it begins with 'mark my heart,ticks its beat'.'.I'm a watchmaker's meat' is such an exquisite phrase.I just love how it sounds and how it contains so much in that phrase.We all are watchmaker's meat..unabashedly so, :)...Though this poem has so so many phrases which are so very well written i want to repeat this stanza,
I wish it meant nothing.
And I wish I could stay.
Sit all day at the table
staring into its face.
Relaxed by its movement.
Following its trace.
Careless and carefree.
No debt or cold sweat...I couldn't take my eyes off these words in specific.I read them so many times.How many times have I wished so..just how many times.I just like the idea of being relaxed by the way the clock works,to trace its hands.It is just amazing to think how 'careless' and 'carefree'..are such guilt words these days,and all cause of an accustomed coerced thinking.Oh 'metropolis,necropolis'..such contradictory twin words..:)
Thank you for always bringing up something new and brilliant.

[Manda]

wow! at first as i was reading this i was like this piece is a drag, but slowly i got more into and by the end i was nearly on my tipsy toes. It was that intense. I love the way you formatted this piece. the way your words flow on the paper. It is a very unique writing, well to me anyway. I don't see many with such stanzas like these. Well another well written piece. and of course SUPERB WORDS!

[KatiePie]

"I'm a watch-maker's meat." was my favorite line. Once I started reading this I was completely addicted, you portray an experience beautifully. Providing just the right amount of imagery details for the reader, enough to let them see the plot flowing perfectly through their mind like an HD movie, but not so much that it drowns the reader in detail, causing confusion. This was perfection. I'm in awe. Gorgeous write, really. One of my favorites.
-Cathrine

[Radiohead]

i like how neatly you pieced this together, it's like a breath of fresh air on a hot day. Excellent!

[emmajoy]

I feel as if I've just run a marathon!

The pace this goes to over such a short time is just amazing.. you've caught the frenetic rushing of getting up and at 'em, kicked at the system Man lives by and in,

' I'm a victim, a seed
of someone else's greed.
A fat man with a bomb
from a movie long-gone. '

. and then you casually drop in how you'd like it to be, the girl, the life, the recognition . .

For me these words are a wake up call, a shout against today's' life and its stifling, terrible continuity, day in and and out .. until the lend when it might be too late.

[.]

"I'm destined to be late.
It was always my fate."

{i read this a few times because it has such a hectic mood--
really intense--a great write-really a smooth fast free flowing mood-
and really relate able--i just was inside this write}

james:-)

[lavina k.]

i m new in this world.......so have no right to give any kind of comments but wanted to say......i liked it very much......the grip was good.......!!!!!!!!!!

[jenniewren (J.W. Bouwma..]

okay so SPOILER ALERT i am so not going to be professional for the next tick or two.

holy fuckles. this is goddamned brilliant. just incredible. i want to hear this performed out loud. just read it okay. please?

that frenetic pace and how it lengthens out as you are more awake, how the wording becomes less cavemen and more fluid.. just like our thoughts in the morning..

just. f****n' hell man. pure unadulterated genius

[Ladysue]

The reader is right there with you; feeling the hurried beat of time. The technique of the flow added much impact to the piece. The hum drum rush of the daily grind came through brilliantly...This was awesome...

[Liza]

i felt like you were in my head from the moment i got out of bed
comforting and soothing write
great flow
enjoyed the wit and humor!