A Beat Of The Wings

A Beat Of The Wings

A Poem by Devons

Antenna and feelers picking up scent
Descends upon flowers, the honey well-spent
Hops bed-to-bed, escapes vent-to-vent
A meander on breezes
with hovering intent

Its vacuum absorbing all that is bright
Consumption for colour, all red, black, and white
Flawless, yet fragile, a glorious sight
Fearsome to predator
Evasive in flight
Stuck in a cobweb, caught in a net
Energy burnt like a quick cigarette
Blood-letting, conflict, deep-red in debt
A gamble of moments
On a destiny bet

Life is short and existence small
Life is a butterfly perched on a wall
Fly away Peter, fly away Paul
A beat of the wings
Then it's death to us all

© 2010 Devons


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Featured Review

okay, this is going into my favorites, like, right now. :) it's very beautiful... there is just a delicate sensitivity about it that immediately speaks to me... that last stanza leaves me speechless ('fly away peter, fly away paul' = is there such a thing as religious romanticism because that line is fantastic)... today i overheard someone say 'the universe doesn't give a s**t about us' -- i think you're saying the same thing here, just in a more gentle, intricately woven way... wonderful rumination on the frailty and transience of life. total love.

(ehh, just reread what i wrote, and sorry if i sound off, i'm very tired... to bed nao. bye.)

Posted 14 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

okay, this is going into my favorites, like, right now. :) it's very beautiful... there is just a delicate sensitivity about it that immediately speaks to me... that last stanza leaves me speechless ('fly away peter, fly away paul' = is there such a thing as religious romanticism because that line is fantastic)... today i overheard someone say 'the universe doesn't give a s**t about us' -- i think you're saying the same thing here, just in a more gentle, intricately woven way... wonderful rumination on the frailty and transience of life. total love.

(ehh, just reread what i wrote, and sorry if i sound off, i'm very tired... to bed nao. bye.)

Posted 14 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

This is absolutely beautiful and so delicate. The rhythm and rhyme impeccable. Wonderful metaphor from start to finish. To pick out specific lines does a disservice the the whole. It is just really well-balanced and fantastic in its imagery. You always raise the bar! Excellent!

~True

Posted 14 Years Ago


Flawless yet fragile. I like that paradox.

Posted 14 Years Ago


this is really good I love it Your words just flew off my computer screen a great read thanks for the read request

Posted 14 Years Ago


I love how skillful you are at using words that create such a good flow. It's like magic. I believe in it and so it works. Your such a inspiring writer and I liked the imagery. I have a great imagination that goes wild with your poem. Butterflys I wonder whats next...

Posted 14 Years Ago


This has a very good and strong structure.
Many many nice metaphors. That's what I liked.
Specially the cigarette, the predator and the process of pollination.

The minimal use of punctuations lends a nice connection between stanzas.

Posted 14 Years Ago


I think this may be one the best poems I have ever read on any of the sites I visit. I love the cadence and the flow, and the rhyming is spot on. You can write my friend...maybe I can forgive you for your comments about hairy men now that I know you can write. Nice work.

Posted 14 Years Ago


This is excellent Devons, love:)
You have gracefully captured the feeling of the image really well, elegantly moving and emotional:)
Wonderful poem
xx

Posted 14 Years Ago



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1484 Views
38 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 8 Libraries
Added on June 7, 2010
Last Updated on June 25, 2010

Author

Devons
Devons

South West, United Kingdom



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