Home

For Nixie's Competition

And so I finally find peace,
solace in blue sea, sky, the white wisp of cloud,
salty breeze in the air, a crackle of pebbles
as I walk to the waters edge
where seaweed slides under the surface.
A foot splashes before being joined by the other,
cold skin shivers, goose pimples.
I look straight ahead, there, on the horizon,
where she waves is where I will go.
My body launches into flotsam and jetsam,
effluent and little fishes, feeling free floating
in the ocean. I close my eyes,
I know there will be no cries, only silence.
Final breath bubbles are swept away,
lost in the foam of immersing spray,
surrendering to the seabed, where crabs
crawl and barnacles slowly bite onto bones.
True friends forever hidden in the depths
And so I finally find peace.

Reviews

[Elena Rojas]

I really like the syllable pattern you put in the poem, and the way you described the ocean. I myself have never seen the ocean, so I have not an idea how it feels to be on the ocean. But alas, I can relate to the fact that I find peace in nature, and in what is around me. Keep up the good work! I can't wait to hear more from you! ;-)

[thewholesoul]

beautiful. great energy in the language. very much enjoyed

[Bowers]

this is beautiful, ALIVE, there is such feeling in this piece, great imagery! :D

[Josh Dollar]

Really good poem. It is so vivid! Well done.

[D. T. Wine]

"Final breath bubbles are swept away,
lost in the foam of immersing spray,
surrendering to the seabed, where crabs
crawl and barnacles slowly bite onto bones."

Haunting! I did enjoy reading your poem. The imagery is both dark and beautiful at the same time....something that is difficult to accomplish. It gave me chills, and even disturbed me a bit. Well done!

-D.T. Wine

[Sami Khalil]

"I know there will be no cries, only silence.
Final breath bubbles are swept away,
lost in the foam of immersing spray,
surrendering to the seabed,"

A wonderful write indeed...:)..............

[CoraZanini]

Something refreshing..so glad I found this.

Nora

[Lisa Victoria]

Beautiful use of imagery...though in the end it sounds to me as if you're surrendering your life to the sea, just my perspective. I really enjoyed reading this piece:)

[mark]

interesting way to describe the ocean. wasn't the best poem i read but it was good. keep writing im sure plenty of other people will like it. i just have a different opinion :) good work though

[Blissful Sin]

wow this really is the poem for peace and making someone feel just right!

-At Home, Bliss

[Rebecca Buller]

This was simply...wow. Vivid. Descriptive. My toes have never kissed the ocean, yet your words made me feel as if those blue waters were just outside my window and I could skim my fingers across its cool surface. So peaceful.