Colour me in Kisses

Colour me in Kisses

A Poem by Gary H

Crimson lines drip down endlessly
Outside a body, inside I WANT to feel you.
Let me open a door
Open until I can see
Understand the struggle you fight
Realise your pain, release your heart.

My world is yours
Emotions affected by the cut.

Incision of that blade hurts me too
Not seen or felt by you.

Knives dig into my body
I let them, want them.
Spurting blood sees demons laugh
Sensing relief when life has no reason.
Enticing I will cry - 'come with me now'
Showering you forever in affection, care and love.
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© 2008 Gary H


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I'm uncomfortable about blood so I can't focus too well on this. But these two lines catch my eye "Incision of that blade hurts me too" and "Knives dig into my body" ... in fact I read them before I read the first line. Thinking about this as far as I can, it is a loving plea couched in the language of the cutter to try and find another way. Strong, bold poem.


Posted 16 Years Ago


7 of 7 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Truly a powerful write. I found my self reading through it a few times as my physical eye was mechanically drawn to the special effects (genius by the way) of this piece. However, after reigning in the physical my mind's eye prevailed and I felt the angst in all its ugliness.

Very effective imagery - all around...

Now, for my burning inquiry - How did you create this special effect? Amazing...

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

OK I had to read it through twice as the graphics drew my eye and my attention down a bit the first time towards the ending lines ahead of time.

I get the feeling that you are trying to understand the feelings of someone you love who has attempted suicide or is a cutter and you want to take away her pain. I'm not sure which. This whole cutting thing baffles me that has gained such popularity. As if insulting one's own looks or starving one's self didn't quite do the trick. Young women just can't seem to measure up to society's image or each others' anymore.
You desperately want to understand, to get inside and release the pain she feels; even take it on yourself, if it will help her.
Your commitment to this person as well as your love is strong as is evidenced in the work here. Bravo

Blessings and Namaste
Rhiannon

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

The effects on this piece are amazing. I really liked what you have done with this. At first when I read the title I thought it might be more of a soft piece, but you really have the hard and sometimes deep pain of love and emotion down here. Wonderful write!

xoxo

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This sounds positively psychopathic. Scary. Great job. And dripping blood.

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

I sense the wanting to take away the pain of a loved one
I really liked this work

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Although I'm not a big fan of acrostics, this is really good. It is such a strong poem in its own right; where many acrostics I have read are not. Also, so much poetry of this genre tends to be self indulgent and predictable but lines like 'Spurting blood sees demons laugh/Sensing relief when life has no reason' ensures this poem avoids this. Good job! NH

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Spurting blood sees demons laugh

Neat special effects! At first I thought it was blood drops and then I thought it can't be. These are kisses so it must be paint drops. The torment of love...the sweet mix of kisses with a twisted feel. Superb job!!

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Such diverse thoughts and images you bring together in this work. Really beautiful.

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

this is so nice yet sad and i can relate so well especially to
Sensing relief when life has no reason.
in a strange way i feel relief and almost free when there is no reason to anything...but i slip too far with it sometimes but this whole poem is amazing
again a wonderful write from you
you capture the feelings so well
xx

Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

i liked the form . as simon would say you are going to hollywood.

Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.


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4400 Views
61 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on February 21, 2008
Last Updated on February 22, 2008

Author

Gary H
Gary H

nowhere, United Kingdom



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