The Pink Elephant

The pink elephant is a tool used by my psychology teacher who would also talk to kids in need of help and advice.

I can't get a break from these demons haunting me in my wake.
I'm trying to take back control of my head,
But I think my heads winning again and it's quite convincing
that I'd be better off dead anyway.
I think I need to leave for a week or so,
disappear to distinguish dispair
but with no where to go
I'm fucked and so is everyone else I know.
I can't believe how fast I could go

from being happy to losing control and once again
becoming so, so, very low.
For a moment, I stepped back and told myself
"You're only 18, you've got so much going for you!
Look at the silver lining, on the bright side, the sun's still shining!
Your life is only arriving and there's so much left for you to do!"
But the sun is black to the boy who found comfort in dark

and to him life lost meaning when is world fell apart.
I KNOW! I KNOW! It's all about perception!

"Remember the pink elephant!"
Well, the damn animal hasn't seen from my perspective!

I've been as low as low gets
and I've been getting high enough
to wave goodbye to passing by jets

so frankly, I'm not too sure where my middle ground is
and once again, here I am, losing sleep over this.
Meditation has taught me something reverends couldn't:
Only I have the strength to save myself when God wouldn't.
I stopped believing in Him when I taught myself how to live,
but I don't feel alive anymore, so neither of us must exist.