What Do I Lack?

If anything, there is one thing I lack...

Tell me

What does she have

That I don’t?

What do I lack?

Beauty?

I can fix that

Straighten my hair

Wear nicer clothes

And get a tan

Just give me time

Smarts?

I can fix that

I’ll write you hundreds of poems

Quote you beautiful Shakespeare

And compare you to the prettiest things

Just give me time

Personality?

I can fix that

I’ll lose the temper

Control my jealousy

And find a sense of humor

Just give me time

I promise with time

I can change for you

Be better than her

So I can finally get what I desire

The one thing she has

That I don’t

Your heart

Author's Note

This is more of an emotional outpouring again. Sorry if the quality isn't up to par with the rest of my writings.

Reviews

[Areya Valena]

The things we'd do for someone. I can relate to this every minute of every day, even though he doesn't have another girl, i feel like I have to be better than everyone.

Its amazing how you ccaptured the feelings so perfectly. With Time...
Love it.

[Viki Rachel]

I honestly just went "Awww," One time I wrote a song about a girl who was jealous of another girl; and haven't we all been there? I won't change myself for a boy ever again, because when I started being myself we actually connected a lot better.
Okay now onto the subject of this fabulous poem. It has good structure, and it's so painfully true and I'm sure many girls are nodding their heads while they read it. It's that familiar mentality of, "I'll do anything, just to make you see how much more deserving *I* am of your love."
Exquisitely beautiful; and I'm not just saying that. It's certainly going into my favorites.

[Emily]

oh, lord.
this hit home, so hard. I absolutely love what you've managed to do here. And, I know exactly how you feel. You've really hit with this.

Remember -- Like I have to -- that it has nothing to do with you. boys are dumb and they act stupidly especially when faced with a confident woman who demands that he grow up...

You, stay beautiful and be who you are! Well done.

Once again, thank you for your review, i am sorry I was so long in returning it... I too had to get away from the way he left me feeling when he turned away from me... and on to her.

[HappyTaylor]

This is beautiful. It made me shiver. Just remember, it's not you that needs to change, it's him that needs to realise what exactly he's missing out on. This was a very nice, emotional poem. Thanks for sharing. :)

[Shelby]

I promise with time
I can change for you
Be better than her
So I can finally get what I desire
The one thing she has
That I don’t
Your heart

How sad that this should be a familiar emotion for anyone. I love how simply you express this, how straightforwardly you write, without complicated explanations of the pain. The loneliness of being on the outside looking in is so clear with your writing. You don't get muddled in pointless or redundant lines of endless clarifications and just let the emotion stand on it's own. Well done and thank you for sharing this with me. If you wrote this, by the way, don't change yourself for anybody. I learned that the hard way.

[Saisha]

it's really beautiful..
loved it...very strong and nicely put together.

"Just give me time
I promise with time
I can change for you
Be better than her
So I can finally get what I desire
The one thing she has
That I don’t
Your heart"

my favorite lines...

[Sunflower 20]

oooh, this is really sad. the one message i got from this is that you don't have to change who you are to find love, love should find you BECAUSE of who you are, at least, thats what i think :)
well done on this piece, i liked the way you ended it:

So I can finally get what I desire
The one thing she has
That I don't
Your heart

great line!

[{A}shley {B}lack @-;-]

I loved the raw emotion that emits from this poem although your other work is perhaps better structured with this poem the rawness adds to the emotion your a very talented writer keep them coming

[Frankie Nguyen]

I really enjoyed reading this (:

[E.M.Oglesbee]

well i can definitely feel your emotion through this and i agree with the earlier comments that this piece is just as good as your other writings, it just is more raw emotion and less refined that your usual things.