Come back

Eh, just tell me what you think.

"No world is perfect...sometimes you just have to take some rain...."

If you can't tell me why you left me

At least tell me what you think it feels like

To have a bare knife shoved right in your backside

I can't see but I know you're crying at the bedside

We can't breathe, but we survive through the tough nights.

One night it's okay, next night's alright, 

Next night you wanna shove glass in their eyesight

But in hindsight you let anger control you

Kick them out, and drive yourself crazy being alone

Now you miss em'

I swear You'll slit my wrist after holding it proudly

Hold a bucket of my tears, and then say you're going without me

"Put down you're bags, Look at my face!"

My back and jaw is broken but i'll walk with you,soft spoken.

And through the pain

I can't say I love it when we fight

but i can pray that the last time, was last night.

Now pull the shards out of my back, I'll do the same

Now tell me you love me so we can restart the game

Neither of us expect any different but-

The game of life doesn't come with just one ending

So come back to me..

(Chorus) *Sampled from "Come back to me, David cook*

You say you're leavin 

 As you look away

  I know theres really nothin left to say  

Just know i'm here  

Whenever you need me  I'll wait for you

Come back to me....back to me....back to me..

(Chorus end)

(Bridge)

I've always heard nobodies perfect,

I've always said all love is worth it.

But it's hard fooling with that circuit,

Heartbreak is a shock that's always hurtin'

I'm not saying this is certain

But it's through the pain that heals

That you are gifted with a heart, a shield

It may be made of steel, but it was made to steal

To protect the both of you

Once everybody is over you

You can begin you're life, now let's fast forward to me and you....

(Bridge)

Reviews

[barleygirl]

Overall, your poem does a good job of describing ambivalence . . . that is, in it one day, not so much the next . . . so true to life. The one thing that makes your poem a little hard to follow is that you switch pronouns. Sometimes "you" . . . other times "they" . . . sometimes "I" . . . other times "you" (referring to self) . . . Your poem will be more powerful if you stick to using "I" and "you" . . . make this mind-struggle between the two of you, up close & personal. When you lapse into "they" and "you" (referring to self), these pronouns put distance between the intensity & the reader. Your poem starts out with straightforward intensity, but then you waffle. Go ahead & tap into your deeper feelings, this is what will turn up the intensity. Hope this helps. I like what you're saying here. We've all felt this way, it's the very stuff of relationships.

[Rippy]

Nice, emotional charged poem. Some i's that should I's, though and the second You're is supposed to your. Put down your bag, not you are.

last time, was last night-- can delete the comma.

Anyway, Your emotions definitely sine through, and believe me, it is a very relatable piece. Keep at it

[Rana]

It was gripping and profound and enjoyable. There are too many lines u've got up here that i could quote as worth quoting and that made me go wow. The lyrics u've composed is great, vivid and whats more, its rhythm does go along with that of the amazing David Cook song lines, yeah the perfect choice of chorus made. Love the theme, especially.

[~]

I can hear your heart crashing into million tiny pieces and each of them asking "why"? well done!

[Luna Zerimar]

Heartbreak.

Yeah, can totally relate.

Especially now...

[Saddam]

I know theres really nothin left to say
Just know i'm here
Whenever you need me I'll wait for you.

What a nice song. You are talented writer my friend.