Darling

The struggle, the push and pulls between a man, his dark side, and god.

(Douglas(Me))

I lay awake on my bedside, Contimplating suicide

I would've been happier if I fought the lullaby as much as I tried.

My eyes open, The door closen, I look happy for someone who's choking

The music screams into my ears, as I have finally awoken

Feel like i've been chosen by the devil, based on the words I have spoken

I'm unknowingly hoping that my own blood chokes me.

Blood as in guilt, and guilt as regret.

I try to sit motionless, But my efforts, Hopeless

"It's time for a change" I say as I reach for my chains.

Wrap it around my neck like a neckbrace as I wander into space.

This isn't suicide, I've been due to die, the memories are what kills me.

But it's pathetic that i even let the passed past get to me.

"It's reaching into my skin

God, please don't let him in!"

Says a 9 year old who today, stopped counting sins at 10

I'd say i'm doing this for my brother

But i doubt he'd even look my way

After the words him and others

Have overheard what I say

 

(Xavier)

But it's fate, my dear child, life is only what you make.

It isn't past,present, or future, you get what you take.

But it's evil demons like me who have saved your life.

Remember that time you almost wrote your name with a knife?

I've given to you, stuff that I wouldn't even give my self.

I've granted you hope in life, make it less of a living hell.

And you call me a regret? Before me you had no respect

Quit crying, you're not dieing, not until I tell you to.

This is my body, my pen, my paper, my strength to raise hell with you.

And to think, I possessed you for ****'s and giggles

You had something different, you had potiential.

So if you think I'm gonna give up like you, go down in the water?

I'm here to help and kill you slowly, so no matter the offer.

I'm gonna be the ringing in your ears, the swears in a bottle.

Your back's to the wall, hands on your head, tears flooding your eyes

Maybe your insane, do I not exist? You can't kill me, no matter how hard you try,

(Me)

Now it's past, blood hardens on my back

It's not over, as life fades into black.

I'm remolding, a new leaf, on my tree of life

Life is barren, but not if i close my eye's slowly.

A new me, forms as The world begins to rumble

But it all comes back once i hear a faint voice mumble.

"I'm never leaving you, darling."

 

 

Author's Note

Ignore the grammar issues, i wrote this off the top of my head in detention.

Reviews

[Ghost Writer]

This is amazing, I sympathize with the feelings. I can feel the pain in the beginning

[Saddam]

Very dark and a gloom write. Keep some smile on your face my friend. But as a reader, a nice pen with a fine head of thoughts. Thanks.

[Avinash]

Your writing dark and gives clues to disturbing experiences. But we should keep looking for light.

[BloodApocalypse]

Amazing work :) why were you in detention for?:o

[Luna Zerimar]

*Shakes head*

You're amazing.

You must know that much.

[Coyote Poetry]

A lot of thoughts and struggle in the poem.
"Now it's past, blood hardens on my back
It's not over, as life fades into black.
I'm remolding, a new leaf, on my tree of life
Life is barren, but not if i close my eye's slowly.
A new me, forms as The world begins to rumble
But it all comes back once i hear a faint voice mumble.
"I'm never leaving you, darling."
The above lines stood out to me. Finding purpose and learning hope by a voice or act. Thank you for sharing the poem. All of us struggle. We need a calm voice to tell us. We are going to be okay.
Coyote