Forgive me.. (Part 2)

Short poems i wrote, divided into parts

I lay on my death bed, My mind's minds jammed up

In front of the door to my happiness, slammed shut

You would think after of this, i would stand up

But i can't, it's been years, i'm frozen from the damn rust.

Well since The only thing walking away is my innocence 

I might as well reveal to the world how i'm not a perfect prince

I lie, i steal, Always doing wrong, i'm never making sense.

When i apologize, fingers crossed, fake remorse to an extent

And now i think, is this what i wanna leave behind?

Body dead, dripping blood and tears that i never cried.

A once little boy, who promised he would never lie

Now it's too late, my body stops, but my soul will never die.

So forgive me..

Reviews

[Rana]

You bring the images out clear in the eye of the mind.. So frank, so cold, so deep, so real.. *_*

[audrie]

I found this piece to be heavy and solemn - nice piece if work!

[Patricia]

An awesome follow up...again I can only say that all of it is within your control, the cause and affect, it is your choice, your strength, your power! We cannot control others but we can control ourselves, our present and future. All these emotions and all the deeds said and done, all can be measured as strength once understanding the suffering that put you in those positions of choices. I can still feel it in this one, the love and strength you want to portray...it is never too late for the body, soul and mind. The fact that you write with so much forth right is telling of strength. Great work here Doug. :)

[Luna Zerimar]

"When I apologize, fingers crossed, fake remorse to an extent".

We all do that once in a while. Hypocrisy is in our blood.

These little, short poems are really making a difference in your writing.

I love how you end this. It's painful, but it makes people want to actually forgive.

Nice poem, Douglas.

[Coyote Poetry]

"Now it's too late, my body stops, but my soul will never die.
So forgive me.."
I like this poem. When I was in the Army. Old wise saying. "All men find Jesus in the foxholes." In the end. We seek forgiveness for things we cannot be forgiven for. No weakness in the outstanding poetry.
Coyote