The Next Morning

While I look at you, I can see you as for some time, absent; not from me, but your own identity.

Gradually, you were giving, absorbed by demand of the environment that you swore never to change you. Sad and heartrendingly, it has left, or rather, has disappeared person that I loved so much.

One day I took a risk, and knowing that we were too different and seeing "they" influenced your life too much and even that I thought you were someone who was worth the gamble. The beginning was beautiful; contradictory ideas and proposals, attitudes of forthright rebellion that allow even to those closest to you. You made me feel free, happy and proud.

But... In the same way as the drop of water over time erodes the more solid stones; the environment surrounding you has finally break and bury a wonderful been. At first, it seemed only an exercise in warmth; give "a little", keep everyone happy. Later, the cordiality became obligation, and the pleasure to feel accepted by the majority and not be judged, has finally give to the will of others.

I said nothing, I could not... I can't. I promised it to me when I found you; I would be with you, accompany you, never would be like "them", never seek to change you.

In my desperation, in a first and last attempt, in the most subtle way I've wondered it; although obviously the answer was known already in advance. "I've changed".

This evening I continue watching you; when I see what your hands or your mouth can sporadically even express, I want to repent, but I know that this irreversible. It's not anyone's fault, and if it is, I agree, is my fault. I thought that you could be like salmon swimming upstream, but was not possible, it was too exhausting for you and I regret it.

Tomorrow, when dawn, I will disappear in the same way that one day I appeared in your life; I know that you challenge and blaming me, I will become the villain, the traitor, but no matter. Tomorrow morning I will go; but I will not go alone, because what you were, always will come with me.

Author's Note

English is not my mother language, please forgive me for the grammar.