Live, love, leave

here

You were

just loving the air

now where?

Leaving, no care?

why so unfair?

always be aware

silence on my ear

missing your glare

Me? It's always a dare

writing on my chair

feeling your hair

breath when i err

that perfume you would wear

a smell fighting despair

but easy there

im good, that I declare

the moon that I stare

moon that has no pair

that you can see anywhere

let it be me but with fear

fighting like a legionnaire

strong as your nightmare

it ends with a tear

but. . .

why would you care?

Reviews

[barleygirl]

As a fellow rhymer, I very much enjoyed your creative long-running rhyme scheme. I have to mention that you tend to pick simple words, one-syllable or two usually. It's nice when you venture out to use longer, more complex words in your on-going rhyme pattern. I love this line: "just loving the air" and "moon that has no pair that you can see anywhere" . . . this is creative writing that comes from creative thinking and observing your world with a pondering mind (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Jade]

I enjoyed the flow of your write, I can feel the emotions through out. Nicely done

[Gabby The GAB]

Thankss for the review, a pleasure to hear that!! :D