If I'm Being Honest

A Story by Gabby Nieves

Something I wrote a while ago but since I haven't posted a f*****g thing in like months here you go.. you being whoever is possibly still reading.....

being with him was like every poem I wish I could have written,
but could never fathom into words.
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February 19, 2016 1:30 PM
The afternoon breeze whistled in through his bedroom window, reminding me that I was real and all the moments of my life had led me to this exact moment. The smell of the air, fresh like clean cotton and childhood memories. Birds singing. Water trickling from the fountain in the lake. I'm sorry to tell you but there was never any beginning to this story, if time is only a figment of our imaginations, I'm not sure a beginning was ever necessary. It was more like I existed in a parallel universe where every step I've made was an inch closer to my fate, but somehow nonexistent. I never spent much time worrying about how everything came to be so perfectly synced, but if you listen close enough you'll hear the answers. The empathetic sound in between the air and your skin, where you feel like everything- (only for a second) is exactly where it should be. The calmness of a train racing past like ten thousand people in one room talking all at once, and the only voice you hear is in the eyes of the person you love. It settled me to know not everyone realizes when the room gets dim at unexpected times, in the middle of a classroom filled with twenty something people, and I the only one taken back by the way the clouds moved effortlessly along the sky. It all reminded me of his hands, the way his veins stuck out when he held the steering wheel. Each line indenting itself into one infinite human being, I fell in love with every single mark on his body. The way his fingers felt wrapped in mine. He moved just like the clouds, peacefully changing the sky. And I existed merely on Earth, a spectator in awe of all his beauty.
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I wanted to run through a field of grass screaming at the top of my lungs, exulted by the madness of human error. I wanted for us to ride carelessly far away from what we're used to, taken back by the roar of the engine, the beast, the Devil. I loved every second of his presence, every moment spent inhaling rubber tires and gasoline, no words could ever fit together to do it justice. And if only he knew I never truly had any idea of freedom until he held my hand and took me out into the calm midnight ocean. Standing on the sand filled floor, drunken with passion as he looked into my eyes, and even though he didn't say anything, I knew he felt it too.