The First Day At School Without Bern

Today was.....weird. I felt an obligation to walk to the top of the hill to console my heart-broken friend. See, her friend died on December 23rd. This girl was 14 and a sweetheart. I walked up to the hill and saw my friend come up as well. I wrapped her in an embrace and felt horrible for her. She seemed to be over it, but as a girl who's known her for 10 years, I knew differently. We sat in different seats on the bus, both trying not to think about the wretched and long day ahead of us. At school, we were greeted with ribbons that portrayed red, green, and the letter "B". B stood for Bernadette. Since we had a two-hour delay, we dropped 4th period. Gym. Bernadette was in my gym class. Thankfully I got to not miss her presence for 2 more periods. 6th period rolls around, geometry, with Mrs. Robinson. Bernadette sat next to me, so I knew that I would feel the loss of her presence as I would feel the loss of my heart. Two boys were fooling around and joking about who got to sit in her seat now. I felt so proud of one boy, when he told them to f-off. But, I guess everyone grieves in their own way. One of the guidance counselors came in. He sat down and stared at us for a while. Then he spoke. "I know everyone sees that Bernadette isn't here." We got quiet and listened. He went on about how if we need someone to talk to, then he is in the guidance office. He said that there were tons of kids who went down there every period just to talk and let out their feelings. Hearing it, so black-and-white, made me cry. And when I cry, I breathe heavily. Another girl, across the room from me, teared up as well. Her loving boyfriend watched over her to make sure she was really okay. I wonder if Bernadette had anybody to do that for her. Eventually the need for tears stopped and we resumed our lesson about circles and lines and....well, I admit that I hardly paid attention. I was too busy thinking about the void that we will all feel in a short while. The rest of the day flew by in a flash. I picked up little bits and pieces of our lessons, but nothing stuck. I kept thinking how can these people laugh and joke when a poor, innocent child recently passed. The school was.....somber....to say the least. The girls who were friends with her put on a happy face, but I could see the pain behind them. The yearning to just stand on a desk and scream, "WHY? WHY BERNADETTE?!" I could see this because I felt this way, too. I guess you could say that the only glimpse of happiness I experienced today was when a boy I might like said hi to me. Yes, a boy saying hi to me was the highlight of my day. But hey, we've all been there. Today was just the start of the many painful days to come. But, there is one thing we can all be happy about. Bernadette Spranzman is no longer in pain. I know this because she is in the arms of the Lord. :)

Reviews

[Jacqueline Lopez]

Beautiful, real and the ending was perfect, but that's life only God knows when he is going to call us.