Present Self Perception.

                     


  


PRESENT SELF-PERCEPTION


State,O' state, at my state I weep;
That has filled my life with pains so deep.
'Tis a vicious circle of thoughts in mind,
And of nothingness in action, now and behind.

I long for that pen of mine,
Which silently made everything so much fine.
But for it's absence O Lord whom do I blame?
I have misplaced it through my deeds of shame!

What was I and what have I become?
Good for nothing, lazy and troublesome.
I compare my state with my peers,
And cannot control my flow of tears.........

But no! ,of these droplets of water, there is no use;
Because to work hard wisely, I did refuse.
For me, there are jokes, laughs and mocks.
A person who could never, never pull up his socks!

The value of time who never understood,
Thought that he would be spoon fed for good.
In almost all things ,he,now stands the last;
Forgetting everything,he just longs for the past.

Thoughts of his mind -full of little joy and pain,
Sometimes of this place, and sometimes of his own lane.
These Thoughts O Lord, make me think of the morrow;
Will this state bring me mere pain and sorrow?

I look at my face,which is devoid of any expression,
Yet within me ,there is a silent aggression.
This place has altered my own blaze;
There's been a tint of guilt in all the days.

All are busy to prove perfection at place yonder,
Yet on this thought, I feel, why do I ponder?
My journeys in thoughts, O' mother , tiring and futile,
Have rendered my inner-self, so weak and fragile.

But some thoughts O' dear, cannot be called so,
For they posses your glance, and then you go...........
And it does give me a moment of relief
But why this place doesn't let live my belief,
That I too can turn a new leaf;
And this , yes, is verily my fief ?

There's prolonged continuity of this dreadful state.
There's no compunction, although its so late.

Lord, O' Lord ,O' my dear Lord !, 'twas from You that I always sought,
Where's gone that strength which I from you got?

There ain't any answer, but, whilst I sleep,
I am driven into a region dark and deep.
A figure clad in white, a seraphic smile who had,
Neared me and spake, "Why art thou sad?,
Why dost the Lord thou interrogate?,
None, but thou art,responsible for thy state!
The strength of which thou dost speak,
Hast been weakened by the vain things thou seek.
Forget them hence, forget them now!
Don't wander asking why and how.
That about which thou art narked , let it be filched in His sight;
Force and set on the path that is right.
And He shall then fill bliss by His might....!"

And then .....it vanished, where I knew not,
I opened my eyes in a state of thought.
Recalled that what he at last spake,
"May it come true", this wish I make,
"May it come true",this wish I make!.












    
                      
 

Reviews

[Katie Flores]

your poem was soo... it drew me in, mirroring, by chance, how i am feeling. as i was reading tears were forming on my lids. the movement of the poem was so soft and gentle, like a guilty child creeping up to its mother to beg forgiveness for an offense. at first i was a little thrown off by your change in diction and syntax, but by the end of the poem it felt right. thank you for this. this is perhaps my favorite piece i have read.

[Gurdeep...The Lost]

Thanku dear katie :-)

[Sleeping Maiden]

Oh boy, how i loved this write so much!! The sadness..the despair... is so expressive!! It made me feel so sad.. but this is such a wonderful work. Brilliantly done! Grief can be exhausting and simply takes energy out..
I love how you wrote this too. Reminds me of shakespeare.. =) I adore it.
Thanks for letting me read this work of yours!
I love it!! thank you.

[Kuhr Gred]

Great work.. and the flow .. i like it.. very much :D

[Sarah Nicole Nadler]

Wow, that's intense and beautiful. Intensely beautiful.

[Gerty]

I had to reread three times because this poem is so deep - there is a lot in there. Yet, it is written with clarity; I can follow where you lead - to a point. Then again in all poetry isn't there a plateau in which few readers go, where only the heart of the writer knows.

[just is]

I must just say WOW, This is so deep and and so heartfelt.
I really enjoyed the emotions you wove through out.
Wonderful write, so heartfelt and tugging!

[Lovely Soul]

I like this. It has a nice flow and message. Good work

[Sugar Plum ♥]

I great almost classical long ode with perfect rhymes and melody! I can`t believe how much tallent someone should have to write this piece! :) for me I don`t for sure...but I enjoyed your pathos and passion in writing!

[Secret Lullaby]

wow this is very good