Midnight Sky~Villanelle

Villanelle Form

 

 

 

Dwelling in sacred thoughts was I

my senses tuned to harmony

Gazing up at the midnight sky

 

A thousand bare stars caught my eye

enchantment reached inside of me

Dwelling in sacred thoughts was I

 

Charmed by a glow,I can't deny

reaping a sweet serenity

Gazing up at the midnight sky

 

Absorbed in moon's dark halo high

my gladdened heart beats blissful glee

Dwelling in sacred thoughts was I

 

As wonders of what,where and why

were revealed so suddenly

Gazing up at the midnight sky

 

Answers on which I can rely

 life's mystery of destiny

Dwelling in sacred thoughts was I

Gazing up at the midnight sky

 

 

Reviews

[Richard🖌]

Gosh, Dear Fran Marie!
Magnetic imagery, alone, renders this marvelous Villanelle a virtual masterpiece of poetical enthrallment … deep and vibrant into my heart's wonder, the senses are filled to the brink by your softly engaging moments beneath the moon's and stars' embrace.
The picture brought to mind "Gothic" — yet, this piece is anything but, and I ached to be there with you, in the night (as you described it) had such a deep, alluring pull on my spirit … excellent poetry often effects me like this.
Brilliantly composed, Fran, you've dazzled with spot-on rhyme, captivating word choices and arrangement, following precisely and faithfully the rules for this amazing form, with but a couple of flow issues in V1L2 and V5L2 where count was lost. V4L2, consider "gladdened".
The depth and originality of your imagination are beguiling, to say the least, and your skills are such to make the boldest poet enviable.

Do I like it? Hah! No, I love it!
Thank you, Lovely Poetess, for sharing You with Us! ⁓ Richard

[Fran Marie]

thanks so much Richard, for reading, and yes, I see what you mean on some count errors .. I will fix that up, I appreciate your review on my poetry and pointers on problem areas...

[Richard🖌]

Thanks, Fran,
How about all the rest I so ernestly and sincerely offered? : )

[Fran Marie]

I love all your comments indeed, always appreciate such sincere and kind words;

[Richard🖌]

Aw, blush!

[Eggplant]

This poem was beautiful! You have great descriptions of your surroundings, and it made me feel like I was there on the scene. I think that everything ran smoothly, except the first line fo verse 2. There were just too many syllables in my opinion, but on the other hand, I don't see how else you could have worded it, so it really isn't your fault it came out like that. I was so pulled into your villanelle, it made me feel like I was reading a girls diary, it was such an exquisite poem. I am impressed by your rhyming skills because you didn't do it so that your poem sounded a little choppy. you made it so that everything just flowed through nicely, and that really is what made the structure of your poem. I really had a great time experiencing your story, because it had so much emotion inside of it. I do wish that you would have added a little bit more to your poem, maybe explain what you are feeling, instead of what the scene around the villanelle is making the reader feel. Add yourself to the poem. "I feel scared within my thoughts..." Something like that. That is how I would improve it, but I am not sure if that is a good idea to your or not. Otherwise, I really liked reading your villanelle, because it made my night (I read this while laying in my bed :p) I look forward to hearing more from you!
-Lily

[Ladysue]

Fran Villanelles are so difficult to write and to have it seem so effortlessly is no small feat. Bravo..

[Fran Marie]

Thanks Sue,so much appreciated,

[Coyote Poetry]

"Answers on which I can rely
to life's myst'ry of destiny
Dwelling in sacred thoughts was I
Gazing up at the midnight sky"
The above lines are true. I enjoyed the journey in your words. Sometimes we must find the reasons and the purpose for our life. No weakness in the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[Fran Marie]

thanks so very much Coyote

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome. Always a pleasure to read your words.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Love it the first time and throughly enjoyed reliving this wonderful piece of poetry.

[Fran Marie]

thanks for reading and reviewing again, Dale; much appreciated;

[shivohumsohum]

Thank you for your submission. We value the poetry you produce and the love you generate.

[Fran Marie]

Thanks so very much;

[shivohumsohum]

okay

[angelina neves]

wonderful!

[Vain Apocalypse]

It's a reflective poem that expresses well the night sky's tendency to instill a serene contemplation. The refrains reflect this theme in their marriage, "sacred thoughts" being indelibly interlocked with the "midnight sky." Of villanelles, this is one of the most enchanting.

[No Longer Writing Here]

Beautiful and you followed the Villanelle form perfectly.