Lost Love

Monotetra Form

Her charm faded surfaced to float
to distant shores he sailed his boat
her depth of joy now felt remote
her heart he smote, her heart he smote

waves wore her pain as blue eyes cried
he disappeared beneath sad sky
dissolved lost love, she wondered why
she wished to die she wished to die


deep deep down her sad spirit bent
she felt forlorn with no relent
no purpose life held since he went
a lost love spent a lost love spent

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Oh, how much this reminds me of Message in a Bottle----

but sooner or later that bottle may come to her with a message saying he will love her through eternity.
really love this piece, Fran....it has that "Cast your fate to the wind" feel of romanticism.
j.

[Fran Marie]

Thank you jacob for
the lovely review ..much appreciated🌷

[Gee]

I wonder what worse, love lost through death or through seperation, have only known love lost to death which has the passing of time numbing but never healing the pain.
I know not of the form but enjoyed reading this well written piem.
Hope you are well

[Fran Marie]

through death IMO
because they're no longer seen
on this earthly plane..thanks Gee
read morethrough death IMO
because they're no longer seen
on this earthly plane..thanks Gee
for stopping by..much appreciated

[Betty Hermelee]

Beautiful metaphors, Fran...."waves wore her pain as blue eyes cried".... a lost love...now further and further away... forlorn she felt....a heartfelt poem "with spirit bent".... is this the ending for them??? one wonders if he will return? Probably not, the love is dissolved....nicely crafted!
Best, B

[Fran Marie]

Thank you Betty
for the kind review

[Betty Hermelee]

You're very welcome Fran.
Best, B

[Mauricio Montoya]

WOW Fran, a love so deep yet shoal and left in a dream that heart kept a wonderlust as a man my life is my loin's how sad this write but nevertheless it's excellent. Thank you for sharing

[Fran Marie]

Thank you Mauricio
for your kind review

[Mauricio Montoya]

Ur welcome

[Brianna Brie]

I still love a good rhyming scheme. This is pretty damn good. I'll have to remember this "Monotetra" form. It works well.

[Fran Marie]

Hi Brianna thanks for dropping
by and for the kind review
good to see you my friend
..it has been awhile🌷
]

[Temperance]

Lost love is sad indeed. You captured the emotion of lost love in the piece. Very nicely done. Temp

[Fran Marie]

Thanks Temp 😊
I do appreciate your comments

[S.zaynab.kamoonpury]

Wow i really enjoyed and loved this rhyme scheme i haven't tried yet, such a soulful beautiful poem, superbly expressed! Kudos for this muse!

Plz check out my two newest poems and comment on one you like . Thanks,

[Fran Marie]

Thank you Zaynab
I so much appreciate your
kind review🌷