It is awful hard to produce a review of a poem that is only three lines long and have it be substantial, so here goes nothing:
The first line "Autumn leaves fall free" has the obvious alliteration with 'fall free' as well as the cross reference between 'Autumn' and 'fall', which may or may not be needed for such a small poem, but overall doesn't detract in the least from the overall feeling of the piece.
The next line "my spirit rides with fall's breeze" is perhaps in need of a slight tune up. The reader already knows it is fall, and that the breeze would also be one of fall. However, the recovery comes with the third line: "crisp wind fills my soul", which is perhaps the most carefully constructed and beautiful line in the poem. This image is homeostatic in its resonance within the reader, as I don't think anyone (at least in my neck of the woods) could possibly ignore the feeling of lungs being filled with the crisp air of fall.
Overall, I 'd have to say that this poem is very well constructed and executed. For such a little treasure, it certainly carries its own weight.
This makes me feel the joy I get when Fall comes with the changing of the seasons. I love the graphics of this piece. Thank you for entering the Contest. I am excited for all you Haiku lovers.
It is awful hard to produce a review of a poem that is only three lines long and have it be substantial, so here goes nothing:
The first line "Autumn leaves fall free" has the obvious alliteration with 'fall free' as well as the cross reference between 'Autumn' and 'fall', which may or may not be needed for such a small poem, but overall doesn't detract in the least from the overall feeling of the piece.
The next line "my spirit rides with fall's breeze" is perhaps in need of a slight tune up. The reader already knows it is fall, and that the breeze would also be one of fall. However, the recovery comes with the third line: "crisp wind fills my soul", which is perhaps the most carefully constructed and beautiful line in the poem. This image is homeostatic in its resonance within the reader, as I don't think anyone (at least in my neck of the woods) could possibly ignore the feeling of lungs being filled with the crisp air of fall.
Overall, I 'd have to say that this poem is very well constructed and executed. For such a little treasure, it certainly carries its own weight.
Fran, wonderfully appealing to my senses...takes me, if only briefly, to my favorite time of year, allows me to feel the fall breeze, see the colors and hear leaves skittering along the ground. Very nice haiku.