One night only

Potentially romance, potentially erotica I'm unsure at the moment. This is an intro and narrates that first moment of awareness.

Her

The first time I saw him was across a sea of laptops and notebooks, with the solvent scent of whiteboard markers heavy in the air as the too small room crowded with people desperate to have their input and make their mark on the latest project.

In a sea of men in their too tight suits with perspiration beading on their faces, he was an aura of calm, shirt sleeves rolled casually up over muscular forearms, dusted lightly with short dark hairs. I couldn't help but to fix my gaze on those arms, and watch his hands as he calmly took control of the meeting and made order from chaos. My stomach tightened as I thought of other uses for those hands, but he would never notice me, so I tucked those thoughts away and promised myself I would save the fantasy for later.
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Him

I was in hell, another Brainstorming session, one of those mindless meetings that sucks the very soul out of the day. You run these knowing that nothing will be achieved, everyone will feel their ideas are the best, then get angry and confrontational as they are shot down in front of their peers. However they are a necessary evil in my line of work, so I gritted my teeth and prepared to make the best of it.

As usual, the conference was too small, overfilled and poorly ventilated. I could already feel tempers fraying, so with an internal sigh, I took off my jacket, rolled up my sleeves and got to work. I was grateful at least that I had been booked into a decent hotel, and my bungalow had a fully stocked mini bar, room service and a huge walk in shower and I intended to make full use of all three when this hell was over.

Then I saw her, standing at the back of the room with the tip of her pen playing against her lips. Tall, with long dark brown hair caught up in a clip so that the ends tumbled back to play at the nape of her neck, she stood out from the crowd of sweaty IT techs and pushy execs around the table.

Carefully,whenever I could I stole a glance and tried to assemble the picture before me. She was wearing a stern and uncompromising black dress, standard office issue, but on her body it was transformed, hugging curves that should have been censored, and perfectly showcasing her hourglass figure that had my c**k twitching as I tried to concentrate on the data I front of me.

As I stole another look, I saw she was watching me. Suddenly my plans for the evening took a whole new direction.

Author's Note

i would love to know what you think. This is an old draft but I plan to develop and work on this and I would love your feedback in on style, pace etc.

Reviews

[The Twin Arenas]

What is this conference for? I don't know much about romance or erotica, but I'll be that s**t is all in the details. Like makin' love. Seriously, though.
Also you use "too small room" and "too tight suits" in short order. You could probably ditch one of those and come up with something else. Use a different spice lol.
But it's good. You can write, which is good start. It's always f*****g nice having something to work away on, chip the f**k away on, polish up. This could be that.
Wouldn't it be funny if right here I wrote "God Bless"? haha, I think so.
Forgive me, I'm stoned and writing reviews. There's some value in my criticisms, though.

[aj milton]

Promising start. At this point we don't know whether this is going to be romantic or just all physical. You need to consider that as the story and the characters develop.

[Anjali]

I guess the second part is as per a male perspective, as for a second I got confused whether the female is describing about another female!

Nice story line and pace. You should develop your work and give it the finishing touch. Would love to see more.

Here's a simple typo I found: (I hope its not offending!)

"However they are a necessary evil in my line of work, so I gritted my teeth and prepared to make he best of it."

Correction:

"However they are a necessary evil in my line of work, so I gritted my teeth and prepared to make the best of it."

[Anushree]

Amazing usage of words to create a naughty situation. And really great writing skills.

[underneathme]

Was that imagery? it sounded so real :) jus because of your words :) yeah the style is fine and acceptable :) follow your style :)

[matrixmark]

Excellent imagery from the off. Quite naughty in bits but so true in many ways that we all have these naughty thoughs from time to time. You are very descriptive in the way you write and would love to see a little follow up to this excellent piece ofwork.

Mark.

[genocide]

so is this a draft but you don't know where you want to take it right now

[Georgina]

I wrote this a few years ago on Opus, and haven't done anything since until my other story on here. I see potential in this, but I'm still flirting with the protagonists, haven't developed my relationship with them yet.

[genocide]

yep can you give me a review on the story godslayer court adjourned

[Jibey]

This flows beautifully. It captures the sweaty atmosphere of the meetings and moves nicely into the dream of release and the possibilities of a shared shower... The writing is controlled and taut... I so wanted the sequel!

[*]

I was a little confused when first reading this until I went back and realized it was taken from two different viewpoints from a woman and a man. I was thinking this was from a bi-sexual woman's point of view until I got to the second to last line.

I'm sure this could be good for those who like erotica if expanded but it would probably need a mature rating. Nice writing Georgina.