Where’s Waldo??

Where's Waldo??

Katherine Hepburn has fallen on the floor,
And you told me you were planning to give me nails,
While Marilyn Monroe gazes at me with a sultry look on her face,
As though she is blowing crescents of air with a,
Never ending kiss.
My picture sits on the side of my bed and it,
Is turned over on its backside, and there's a blank spot on my wall.
A blank spot on my wall.
Romeo, if you had just lent me the nails there wouldn't be a,
Hole at the side of my face distracting from my artistic gifts,
And there wouldn't be a scratching post resting beside envelopes with odds and ends,
And dusty pieces of old promo equipment, or a sign shoved underneath the bags,
Or pieces of scotch tape stuck in various places,
Telling each new visitor that they needn't mock, with an air of permanent craziness,
Giving some impression of the owner of the room,
Before they even see me, there wouldn't be litter pans with uncovered kitty deposits,
Which I had forgotten to clean,
Or stains on my bedspread, or a cat, which sits languidly in the window between the curtains gazing with rapt attention,
As though a bird will arrive at any second,
With less hesitation than I wait for a boyfriend to enter.
Where's Waldo? He must be somewhere in all this mess,
And a tube of bubbles that my therapist provided, telling me I,
Should blow it in order to handle what we call 'stresses.' I think everything would be fine if,
I just had a little bit of loving from a good man.
Katherine Hepburn, stop looking at me,
For as Romeo did not provide nails, I am unable to salvage you from your,
present circumstance,
Though if my shirt fit I would be mightily able to think,
Less about my beer-bloated stomach maybe, and more about doing something about it,
But in all of life, we're always trying,
To do sometihng about it . . .
But if I could just find Waldo in this mess then maybe I,
Would be totally cool with just a few beers and woebegone sex,
I don't need very much, I just want to know,
Where Waldo has been,
I don't need a relationship, I don't need love I don't need a great career or a night in Panama even,
Or these freaking nails,
Just figure out what you did with Waldo for me please, where is . . .
F*****g Waldo? Help me find him,
I need to bed. I'm tired of all these strange communications. Give me Waldo,
So I can tuck in for the eve. Why did you take him away from me, anyhow?
I want him back.
Give me Waldo. Give me,
Waldo,
Waldo,
WALDO!!