The Offer

Ignore the words I speak,

As it's the silence that I relish,

The pure fractions of my heart bloom in it's bliss,

For my mind has tempered the blades that I spout,

The daggers that pierce your weeping soul,

In the absence of speech only I suffer it's edge,

Though the torment would surely taint me,

If I speak I must witness the tears of a seraph,

Yet in silence I must endure the claws of my demons.

I can see the pain inside you,

The loneliness you have carried,

The greetings and farewells of the man you love,

I outstretch my hand a pillar for you to lean on,

Let me share the weight that you carry,

For my body is numb from the scars that I conceal,

So let me carry your troubles away,

You need not worry for suffer I cannot,

I shall smile and give you peace of mind.

You declined and offered to set me free,

Give me back to the world that had birthed me,

I thought a demon and a seraph could not coexist,

Though we fight on trying as if we have something to prove,

You declined me once...refused to let me carry your burdens,

So I offer a deal you cannot refuse,

We share the load that both of us disguise,

For if we mixed the troubles that ail us,

We'd be one and the same equal eye to eye.      

Reviews

[devon]

This was fantastic. It gives a feel of "yin and yang". The dark and light - the demon and the seraph - come together to coexist, to simply exist. This was great! I'm so glad I saw your read request this afternoon.

[Forgotten]

Well thank you that put a smile on my face, I'm glad you enjoyed it Devon :)

[devon]

You're welcome!

[Jack...]

Outstanding my friend. polar opposites working together to lift the same load. If only it could be... Loved this one.

[Forgotten]

I think it can be, it happens time to time. Not often but it does, glad you enjoyed this one

[Shaun Payton]

Excellent, touches emotions.

[Forgotten]

Thank you Shaun :)

[Shaun Payton]

You are welcome:)

[Robbie~xoxo~]

Dearest John,
Only you could display such novelty in this emotional dejection...
No one should find fault in offering their shoulder to lean on.
You have always captured a certain fragility in your poetry, which I find
so endearing...

Well penned, Love~xoxo~

[Forgotten]

Thank you I agree, no-one should feel like it's wrong to offer help. Always a pleasure to see your reviews Robbie

[Robbie~xoxo~]

It's my pleasure, John. :)

[Frieda P]

Very deep John had to read this one over...love the last four lines, killer closer. Outstanding.

[Forgotten]

Thank you Frieda, I'm glad you enjoyed this one

[KeeD]

The way you describe the poet witnessing the tears of a seraph, one of the highest order of angelic beings in the universe touched me on a different level. It felt so real and i'll admit I am an emotional guy but this was different it felt spiritual in a sense. Traditional Indian's and Hinduism follows a way of life called Dharmas from the vedic period on wards and the final step is the path to enlightenment, being one with God and giving up all worldly desire and possessions.. I felt that only by achieving this enlightenment would a person ever be able to connect with an angel on that personal sense, amazing.
okay getting back to this poem, omg AMAZING concept, the closing stanza was brilliance this was my favorite part.. how well you worded it sir "So I offer a deal you cannot refuse,
We share the load that both of us disguise,
For if we mixed the troubles that ail us,
We'd be one and the same equal eye to eye." You have my vote for poem of 2014.

[Forgotten]

I'm not a firm believer in God by any means, but I love the lore behind religion. Thank you for your review :)

[Solilokiss]

An excellent write. Well done.

[Forgotten]

Thank you, glad you enjoyed it

[Coyote Poetry]

"So I offer a deal you cannot refuse,
We share the load that both of us disguise,
For if we mixed the troubles that ail us,
We'd be one and the same equal eye to eye. "
I enjoyed this journey. Good to offer to help. It is better to join the journey and know the burdens. I like the complete story in the poem. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Forgotten]

Always a pleasure to see your reviews, thank you Coyote

[Sami Khalil]

A very interesting read and write. Thank you for sharing...:)............

[Forgotten]

Thank you Sami, I'm glad you like it

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:).........................