All in All Part - 3

Apart of myself cried, tears filled in my eyes

Sometimes I just can't sit and take all of the lies

or the way you look down upon me forcing me to sigh

Wonder if it be any different if I was saying bye

You smiled at me, I smiled back

Wishing I could turn back I will push forwards

I will stay just a friend, I'm truely yours

I liked you from your hair styles down to the floor

Why let this loving girl walk out of the door?

Everything I would fight for damn you are so much more

Girl you got my head sore, and if its meant to rain

then let it pour, just let it pour

 

As I look into your eyes I remain lost in the lies

I  don't want to be alone or in a lonely state of mind

I see you and me, in a heavenly bond

I feel your the one who brightens up my day like the sun

Reviews

[The Scholar]

Last two lines of the first stanza were perfect. Great poem.
Do you sing, by chance? 'Cause your poems all have such great flow.

[Anonymous Me]

and now you made me cry. thanks bud

[AK]

Very nice poem:) it was straight and to the point, wonderfully described. Great write!

[Victoria PoetryBunny]

I love the feeling that shows straight from the beginning. I also really enjoyed this, and the sweet descriptions. I can not pick a part I like, because I enjoyed it all. Very nice.

[Who Cares]

This was intense. Having this embodiment of perfection right in front of you but her only wanting to be friends that makes a great poem. Your word usage is beautiful and powerful, it most definatly gets your point across but it still leaves the reader thinking. The line "then let it pour, just let it pour" was beautiful. Repetition is always a good thing to use in any writing but it wasnt overpowering. Great job .

[Aella.lives]

I was a little thrown from some grammar issues, but the last few lines of the first stanza were great. "let it pour, just let it pour" loved that line.

Good poem. :)