In Return

Another one

 

Forgotten Promises

And cold lies

Were all you had to give

I gave you my heart

Though you took it

You never gave me anything

And you left me bereft

Alone

Without your heart

Or mine

And I cry

Without comfort

Without hope

I get no justice

My soul has been damaged

And marred beyond repair

For I gave everything

And got nothing in return

Reviews

[.]

Very moving and lonely write. The pain of unrequited love is tremendously unbearable. Like you become frozen, but just want to know the truth. Then again, the real truth is what makes you want to die more as well. This was full of feeling and emotion. I loved it a lot! Very well penned!

Mikey

[Danielle Asher]

you wrote this painful message very clearly. It was easy to read and just as painful. Sometimes people like to get into big fancy language and really make the truth of their pain look exquisite. Not though I do appreciate that as well, when you are hurting sometimes the best way to put it out there is just simply. It is so painful and the pain is felt to the readers. I am sorry that you are hurting. Keep writing.
I hope what I wrote made some sense. :)

peace,
Danielle

[QuillandInkWhispers]

That was so sad and painful. I felt the pain. Very Good!

[James K. Blaylock]

This is such a sad piece. When love is given and not received; then we feel nothing but alone in the exchange. Love is after all, a two-way-street. Good luck on the contest.

[Requiem]

I thought I recognized this poem! Turns out I already reviewed it! lol Anyhow, Nana, thanks for entering my 'pain' contest and I wish you the best of luck!

[S. P. Vaporis]

hearts are made to be broken but that does not make the pain any easier to bear. thanks for sharing this. ~peace~

[[untitled]]

all to acurate...

[Joshua]

Ouch! Reminds me of that line from "Head On" by the Jesus and Mary Chain - "...and all I ever got from you, was all I ever took from you..." Fairly straightforward in content - have you considered trying a version with more associative images/phrases? Just a thought, overall quite good.

[Shelly Wiseberg]

A sad and painful poem, many can relate to the false promises that cant be delivered by the players of the heart.Remember karma can be a big b***h haha
by one's own doing, Shelly

[Emily B]

sometimes the simplest words have the clearest, deepest meaning.

[Tamme]

Very well written.