Feelings

In order to hide what I am feeling,

I smile and act like nothing has occurred,

Though my pain doesn't seem to be healing,

And what the future holds for me is blurred.

Holding in my feelings isn't working,

It's making the pain grow so much stronger,

The voice inside of my head is lurking,

I can't deal with it's cruel words much longer.

But, i guess it won't make others happy,

Having to deal with my despondency,

I don't really care if I'm unhappy,

They don't much care for correspondency.

I know I'll never deserve a good life,

So many others deserve more than me,

what's the harm in ending it with a knife?

Knowing how much of a waste I can be.