A Single Tear

A single tear

Hits the paper before her

But no more tears follow

 

She feels the pain,

The hurt that always accompanies

That flowing of emotions known as crying

 

But for some reason this time,

No tears fall—the hurt is there

But the release refuses to come

 

She longs for it—that release

It will bring sleep, and comfort

But only after the pain of the emotions

 

But being unable to cry

Makes it almost hurt more

Stuck in a place not knowing how to escape

 

The only way she knows

To fix this unexplainable pain

Is to make it worse— push her over the edge

 

So she begins to think

Pulling up any memory she can

The worst times in her life

 

Slowly, with every painful memory

Flashing across her vision

The tears begin to fall

 

She cries herself to sleep

Welcoming the dreamless sleep

But slowly, a single tear forms yet again.

Reviews

[Arsenic]

Interesting, the other two harness more emotion more power. They bring more......thoughts than this.

Arsenic

[InkBlack]

Eh,
it was OK.

Don't get me wrong, I do not hate or dislike this piece. I think you have a great idea going, but you're not presenting it in a clear way.

A few improvements you could make would be not being so wordy, some lines could be shorter than they are. Sometimes short and to the point is better than long lines that ramble on and on about something, I think that this poem is one of them.

Another thing could be to get rid of the hyphens because they don't need to be there.
Here are some suggestions...

"No tears fall, but the hurt is there"

"She longs for that release
Which will bring sleep and comfort"

"The only way she knows how to fix this unexplainable pain is to make it worse
To push her over the edge
To make her cry"

Again, these are suggestions and you do not have to take them, but they're there if you want them :)
Nice start, but perhaps you could find a way to deliver better