Papa

For my papa. The only one I ever knew, the one that would sit and tell me stories, the one I'd talk about music with, the one who showed me about a bass guitar, and the one that I'm losing now.

A small girl standing in the shadow
An older man, big, scary, intimidating
She never knew
Years later, 14 years old
The same small girl sits in her papa's chair
Holding his old and cherished bass in her lap
Plucking away at the strings
Unaware of how little time she has

I used to fear my papa
His loud boom of a voice and huge hands
That could pop our bottoms if we were unruly
Sitting in his recliner
Watching the news
Occasionally nodding off
He looked so peaceful
He wasn't scary anymore

Now, as I see him helpless in his hospital bed
Silent tears run like a leaky faucet that can't be fixed
I remember that man from my childhood
I wonder why the hell I didn't listen
His stories, his small lessons, tales from older days
Why didn't I take as much time as I want to now?
I miss the time I could've had
I know I can't have it back

I know that the bass lessons are mear memories
Something to bring a smile when I think of it
I think of the things he used to tell of
I'm glad I listened then
I remember him asking if he had me doing something that bored me
Whenever I pulled out my phone and fired a text
Why didn't I leave it there?
Little girl, little girl; Use your time with him wisely, for it is limited

Papa, I miss you
I'm sorry I didn't come to you more
I love you, my grandpa
The only one I've ever known
The one with the loud voice, but the big heart
Dispite your many flaws and mistakes
I don't want you to go...
Please don't leave yet... Papa...

Author's Note

This probably isn't my best work, but it's setimental.

Reviews

[Satellite Heart]

sentimental pieces are the best in my opinion. I loved it