TBA

A Story by Fiddle

A short storyline I've been thinking about for a couple of days.

    I stand here holding her hand. Her hands are always impossibly softer than they look. The light's playing tricks in all the smoke, it almost seems like she's smiling; She isn't though.
   If she looks away I would probably be more devastated than she could ever imagine. I need to see her eyes right now, more than I ever have. I remember staring into the green islands of her irises while laying in bed. I never want to forget that moment, and I never will.
   The cold carries her breath with such a fluid motion compared to mine, exploding into existence followed by a rapid dissipation into the surrounding space. Sounds of water dripping from a relatively close distance.
   My clothes are soaking wet from the rain earlier in the day. A shirt I wore a thousand times and hoped a thousand more, it was the first thing she ever gave me. I didn't wake up this morning expecting this to be the current situation, so I just grabbed a couple of mismatching socks and threw them on without thinking twice. If someone asked me a hypothetical question about this very moment and what I would be thinking...I would've never imagined it would be her and my mismatching socks.
   "I love you," she says.
   Her voice is trembling but her eyes don't move at all. The only words I could ever wish for. I've heard them a hundred times before and I will never tire of them. The short and sweet sign off of a phone call to the life changing first time she said it, the three words I would gladly have as the last to fall on my ears. Whenever she slipped it into the middle of a sentence I would get so flustered and lose my train of thought. She said it was cute and I didn't ever mind. This time it's different, I can't feel the rush that usually accompanies it. I'll chalk it up to all the adrenaline coursing through my system. My heart is beating so much I honestly think it could just stop at any moment...
   A chorus of clicks interrupts me and I'm back on the hill with her. I took her there after supper with her parents. It was a ten minute walk from the extravagant home where she grew up on a beautiful countryside. The sun just passed the horizon and the sky was on fire. We laid there listening to the crickets and watching the lightning bugs signal their love across the tall grass. I waited all day for this very moment and I couldn't have picked a better time in the world.
   "How do you see the rest of your life going?" I tried not to sound to giddy but I doubt it was as smooth as I remember it.
   "Well," she thought for about 6 seconds which is actually a normal amount of time for her, "I don't really know. I mean, I want a nice house with a porch and I want a successful job that I enjoy."
   "Typical answer, I was hoping for something a bit more bold than the cookie cutter lifestyle from you."
   "Well mister oh-so-bold, tell me, what do you see then?" The smirk on her face was priceless. I couldn't have set myself up better than that.
   "I see a beautiful white dress. I see us bickering over what shows we have to watch when our favorites overlap. I see dance recitals and baseball games. I don't see a house though, I see a home...with a porch. Earlier today I asked your father for your hand in marriage. I see you and only you."
   Her smirk faded at white dress. The tears started at home. The smile started at marriage. It was perfect.
   "Will you-"
   The gunshots silence everything. It's all gone with no trace of anything. No hillside, no crickets, no green eyes. I can't feel anything but the air going into my lungs and it's getting shorter, more rapid. I begin to hear shuffling through all the silence. The feet of the men all walking away. Heavy and with intent. There is another sound though and I can't bare to open my eyes to admit it.
   The wall behind where I stood is bleeding down to meet me. I don't want the last thing I see to be her eyes dark and cold but I can't resist seeing her face one more time. I can barely move but I manage to reposition myself into my final resting spot.
   I don't understand. Instead of a lifeless love, I only see a ring and her feet.
   Today I was killed by a man and his need for undeniable power. Then I was killed by a woman and the heart I thought existed. I don't know which was worse. Knowing the bullet had my name on it or never seeing it coming.
   She's walking away. I wonder if she looked back.