Through Pain

A poem that began but suddenly ended, without resolve.

Happiness has not the depth of pain,

Sunshine hath not the touch of rain.

In sorrow and solitude we find,

A chance to see and rewind.

The beating heart whispers to me,

"I bled for you, but did you see?"

 

The blood flows in conscious rhythm,

And life becomes its own pilgrim.

The journey takes to places deep,

Where death's awake and life's asleep.

The depth within goes deeper still

I surrender my heart, my soul, my will.

Author's Note

Be critical....it only improves...

Reviews

[Onyia-Ali, Kingsley Chu..]

Wow!, this is a nice poem. I must confess, I appreciate the end pair of rhyme. It creats its musicality and hold the poem together in one voice. I like how you had ended the poem. Well done.

[Ed Hart]

i think it resolved quite well

[.]

~ pain hath not the skill to fly ~ rain can't warm the cold and dry ~ in bliss and pleasure we find ~ a path to reach greater heights ~ the passionate heart whispers to me ~ i am with you, fly freely ~ zest flows in conscious rhythm ~ life becomes an ode to enthusiasm ~ the journey leads to sparkling stars ~ to loving intensely and other such powers ~ the heights have no limit in mountain or hill ~ i cherish my chance to celebrate my free will ~ ~ ~ ~ is that critical enough for you ? ... haha... :P ~ just kidding... ~ you wrote a beautiful piece of poetry... about one of the most universal of emotions... i relate to all that you say here but i don't agree with the idea of comparing happiness with sadness... both have their unique role(s) in facilitating human evolution... :)

[FeatherOwl]

Touche...
Do you think the place where sadness takes you is parallel to the place happiness takes you? Not necessarily in their extreme forms, but in our general, pedestrian experiences?
Thanks for the critique...point taken and appreciated :)

[.]

~ thank you, seher... i was just being funny... i don't know how to critique poems... i just know how to hear them in my heart... and i did hear your poem in my heart... :)

~ i think that the energy that sadness creates can lead to inspiration for immense happiness... if channelized skillfully, sensitively and sensibly... :)

[Ed Hart]

bravo

[.]

~ i learnt that from you, maestro ed... ~ you lead so finely by example... :)