E-Mail to God.

 

 

E-mail to God.

 

Dear God, I am riting this to let you no
My Mom's coff got worse and she's now ad to go.
I dont no your E-mail but your everywhere
So ope sum angel gives it you God, cos you care.

 

Mom's gone to an ospital they called a Respite
I think that's the name - an I hope it's spelled rite.
They won't let me go cause it's too far away.
But they dont no she hates eggs, an she wuddent say.

 

'Er pane isn't bad when she first gets in bed
But she likes extra pillas God, under er head.
My Mom's got red air tho she's not got much now
But she likes it combed gently or else there's a row.

She's got such good skin an a beootiful smile
She likes frilly nightys an keepin' up style.
I 'ope someone there reads to 'er every nite 
Then says God bless ya an' ope t' bed bugs dont bite.

 

I thought I wudd tell you sum things they wont no
And God, cos your busy, I will sign this off now.
But I do want to say - - - just before I press send,
She's got nobody there so God -  pleese be 'er frend.

 ,

Reviews

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

What a wonderful poem you've written here.
In the first line of the first stanza, I think it should be "writing" and not "riting". And the first line of the last stanza should be 'Some things" and not "sum things". Apart from that, I think message is well passed.
I think I have to write God a mail too.

Nicely conveyed, Fay.

[Fay Slimm]

Yes do go ahead and write one of your own Kay - a message to God should have no hangups when a parent is gone and a child knows not why..... thank you ever so much for your helpful review .

[barleygirl]

This is an awesome flight of imagination! I really felt the warm heart of this precious childlike narrator. Some may over-do dialect, so I'm particularly enthusiastic about how well you handled the misspellings of a child -- just the right number & kind, so it doesn't interrupt clarity of reading flow. Many poignant realistic details, but my favorite -- when the kid worries that people won't know about all mom's favorite things, which are creatively discussed! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Fay Slimm]

Ah - - am delighted you dug up this posting Margie as I wrote it just after reading how children are often neglected when Mom has to be treated away from home - the worry that she will not be given the foods or clothes she likes can dominate a small girl's mind which I tried to describe - - the letter was of course to God and the child's faith that something I aimed to highlight - - thank you for your generous review and am thrilled at your request that we become friends - - Huggles galore -- from Fay xx

[Paul Bell]

Fantastic write. Only a child could write such an innocent letter with such a powerful message.
Life really sucks at times, but I think this letter might get through the right channels to God.

[Fay Slimm]

So pleased you saw the message through the childlike spellings Paul -- - yes I agree life is so hard at times.......... letters from children I feel do get through.......... thanks so much for your visit to Email to God................ Fay

[Neville]

This not only very clearly demonstrates your true poetic diversity and talent, it also brought a tear to this ard geezers eye...

Neville

[Fay Slimm]

The fact you were moved by the child's message is enough Nev - - so many of these young hearts are torn when a mother goes for treatment they find hard to understand..... hoped this would come across............. thank you most kindly my friend.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

reminds me of Gwendolyn Brooks and how she wrote poems from the perspective of very young people...this is amazingly accurate capturing the spellings and tone...and is very emotional.
so creative and just so well done,
j.

[Fay Slimm]

Sincere thanks for this lovely review jacob - the spelling I wanted authentic so hoped it would be understood.

[Fay Slimm]

The verse is written in the idiom a child would use as expression of concern for her mother - - - hope you can make out the spellings and that you enjoy the read. "